95 Signs You’re Ready to Welcome Your Little One

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If you’re approaching the final stretch of your pregnancy, you might find yourself questioning whether it’s time for the big arrival. Fear not! Here are 95 unmistakable signs that labor might be just around the corner:

1. Your doctor confirmed your pregnancy nearly 10 months ago.
2. Friends and family can’t resist asking, “HAVE YOU HAD THAT BABY YET?”
3. Your Facebook feed is filled with updates about your still-pregnant status.
4. Comfort has become a luxury; sleeping on your back, side, or even with a mountain of pillows feels impossible.
5. You’re practically living in the bathroom, visiting it around 198 times a day.
6. Strangers think it’s okay to touch your belly without asking.
7. You’ve just found an incredible book that you can’t put down—perfect timing, right?
8. You’re still undecided on a name for your little one.
9. Your mother has come to stay, ready for labor, but is more focused on rearranging your spice rack.
10. You’ve splurged on a non-refundable BABYMOON, but now it’s looking like a distant dream.
11. Tears flow as you lament the missed opportunity for that getaway.
12. You’re experiencing something called THE BLOODY SHOW—just make sure to add jazz hands when you share that news.
13. Nightmares haunt you about giving birth to a fully grown celebrity.
14. You find yourself waking up from a rather unexpected dream involving a certain pop star.
15. You can’t stand that pop star, yet you catch yourself singing “Baby” to your plants or pets.
16. Family members want to know if you’ll name your baby after them.
17. You’re getting random strangers to help tie your shoes.
18. You declare, “I AM SO SICK OF BEING PREGNANT!” at least once a day.
19. The thought of prenatal yoga no longer excites you.
20. An urge to paint the nursery hits you out of nowhere.
21. You’re frantically Googling how many onesies you actually need.
22. Panic sets in over whether or not to circumcise.
23. You start stressing about wage gaps your daughter might face in the future.
24. You’ve scheduled some pampering—getting your hair done, that is.
25. Your hospital bag still sits unpacked.
26. Your OB-GYN hints that labor is imminent.
27. You get stuck in traffic on a scorcher of a day.
28. The realization hits that you’ll need to teach your baby how to use the potty.
29. Your friend is throwing an epic BBQ, and the timing feels suspiciously convenient for labor.
30. One of your other kids manages to break a bone.
31. The cashier at the store makes a comment about how you’ll be having that baby soon.
32. Your baby’s birth will forever share your wedding anniversary or birthday.
33. Your kitchen is devoid of any tasty snacks.
34. You’re still torn between cloth and disposable diapers.
35. Bottles versus breastfeeding is another debate on your mind.
36. You haven’t settled on a sleeping arrangement for the baby, but your cat loves the co-sleeper.
37. Heartburn has become your constant companion.
38. Your favorite pair of leggings finally succumbed to wear and tear.
39. You find yourself crying at sappy commercials and unexpected scenes in shows.
40. Everyone seems to have a horror story about their own childbirth experience.
41. All you want is a Chocolate Frosty from Wendy’s, and no one gets the hint.
42. You’re unsure if your water broke or if you just had an accident.
43. Your back feels like it’s about to break from the strain.
44. You rush to the hospital only to find it’s just Braxton Hicks contractions.
45. Your doctor announces they are going on vacation.
46. Voicemail messages flood in asking if you’ve had the baby yet.
47. You’ve developed a waddle that could rival a penguin’s.
48. While assembling the crib, you realize vital screws are missing.
49. You’re Googling how much wine is safe during the last month of pregnancy.
50. You give glares to anyone casually sipping wine nearby.
51. Worry creeps in about the cold medicine you took before realizing you were pregnant.
52. You toss a magazine across the room in frustration over celebrity body standards.
53. You can’t even pick up the magazine you threw.
54. Those empire-waisted maternity shirts spark fantasies of a bonfire.
55. Sleepiness has become your default state.
56. Except at 3 a.m.—then it’s all about that bathroom trip.
57. You’re searching for ways to kickstart labor.
58. Labor-inducing sex starts to sound like a plan.
59. You hear about a magical salad that supposedly induces labor.
60. You begin to reconsider the idea of natural childbirth.
61. Your dishwasher breaks down, adding to your stress.
62. A neighbor shouts, “ANY DAY NOW, RIGHT?” across the lawn.
63. You jokingly show your partner your chest, saying, “HAVE YOU SEEN THESE YET?”
64. Your breasts feel like they weigh a ton.
65. Seat belts become a source of annoyance.
66. You swear you’ll never allow your kid to watch TV while they’re young.
67. You’re convinced you deserve a push present.
68. The debate begins: should it be a charm bracelet or a Big Mac?
69. At the very least, it better be a candy bar.
70. You start laughing at the thought of pregnancy-related adult films.
71. Your friend announces their baby name on social media, and it’s the same one you had in mind.
72. You can’t help but notice that laughter comes with a little leakage now and then.
73. Those tiny baby socks have you feeling emotional.
74. Your bathtub feels annoyingly small.
75. You can’t recall if you can enjoy long baths in the final weeks of pregnancy.
76. You stumble upon a stunning bathtub image online and feel envious of its size.
77. Your cravings for French fries go unfulfilled, and it feels personal.
78. You can’t remember half of what you learned in Lamaze class.
79. You feel like you’re at your limit with pregnancy.
80. A relative shares their traumatic labor story.
81. You dread the thought of sharing a recovery room with a stranger.
82. It dawns on you that you still don’t have a car seat.
83. Installing a car seat feels like rocket science.
84. You feel judged when ordering a caffeinated beverage at your favorite café.
85. Your cat has taken to walking across your belly.
86. You’re convinced you’ll be pregnant forever.
87. You finally sit down to enjoy a meal—only to be interrupted.
88. Your contractions are ten minutes apart, but then they just stop.
89. The moment you finally drift off to sleep, those contractions return.
90. Of course, they decide to start while your partner is miles away.
91. And just when you think it’s all over, your water breaks in the snack aisle of Target.

This piece was originally published on November 20, 2014.

If you’re seeking more relatable content, check out our other posts on home insemination kits and learn more about IUI success rates.

In summary, these humorous signs capture the chaos and anticipation that accompany the final days of pregnancy, reminding you that you’re not alone in this wild journey.