Menu Lifestyle
When an Adopted Executive Unraveled Her Biracial Roots
by Lisa Harper
Updated: Aug. 2, 2016
Originally Published: Oct. 9, 2014
© Harper Collins Publishing
Lisa Harper, a seasoned executive and author, grew up in a vibrant neighborhood as the cherished daughter of dedicated African-American educators. Yet, at the tender age of eight, her father, a chemistry professor, and her mother, a schoolteacher, revealed a life-altering truth: she was adopted. From that moment on, her family’s history regarding her birth parents was shrouded in silence, leaving behind only a few hints and tales to fill the gaps. However, as health concerns crept into her midlife, Lisa felt compelled to uncover her genetic background, leading to shocking discoveries about her adoption papers.
The highest-ranking female at a prominent media company known for its focus on African-American business news was, astonishingly, the child of a white man. Recently, I had the opportunity to chat with Lisa, whose memoir, Letters to My Lost Family, launched earlier this year.
Interview Excerpts
LH: You not only uncovered your family background, but here you are at a company that celebrates Black culture, and you find out that you’re—
LC: That I’m biracial! It was comforting as a child to feel connected racially to people I believed were like my biological kin. So when I discovered that my biological father was white—and Jewish, to boot—it was quite a shock.
LH: Why was that?
For a few reasons. At my core, I identified as a Black child. Being constantly asked, “What are you?” made it comforting to have a straightforward answer, something solid to stand on. I’m Black. End of story! I wish I could add more layers, but that was exotic enough!
Moreover, my parents instilled in me a profound appreciation of Black culture and history, which shaped my identity and self-worth. When I learned that my biological father was white, it altered the narrative I had constructed about my parents. I had envisioned a romantic story of a Black couple separated by circumstance, but reality flipped that narrative.
LH: Has your perspective shifted since then?
Absolutely. My view of my heritage has evolved, but my sense of self remains intact. Race is a complex tapestry woven from physical appearance, upbringing, and the truth of one’s genetic makeup.
If you were to ask me today who I am, despite the new information, my answer is unwavering: I’m Black. My kids chuckle at me, saying, “Really, Mom? You’re biracial.” Society often pressures us to choose a label based on how we present ourselves. That affects everything—opportunities, perceptions, and first impressions. It seems a bit silly to not embrace what the world sees. Take President Obama, for instance; while he’s clearly biracial, he’s labeled our first Black president instead of the first biracial one.
LH: How do your kids perceive their identities?
My son, with his hazel eyes, has always felt different from the rest of us. It bothered him growing up, and he often tearfully exclaimed, “Just tell me! I’m adopted!” I reminded him, “You look just like your dad!” But having one distinguishing feature made such a big difference for him.
LH: Your adoptive parents were proud Black figures. What happened when you asked, “What if I married a white guy?”
Oh boy, my dad exploded!
LH: And what about your birth mother’s upbringing?
She lived in a unique bubble, having been raised by a wealthy family in the entertainment industry. Surrounded by other mixed-race children, she had a very different experience than mine. She adopted a broad-minded outlook toward cultures and races, firmly rejecting stereotypes.
LH: Why didn’t she inform your biological father about the pregnancy?
Well, they weren’t in a relationship, and marriage wasn’t on the table. She understood the racial dynamics of the time, and while she might have been intrigued by her dad’s fame, she was still a Black girl navigating a different societal reality.
LH: Have you ever met your biological father?
No, I haven’t.
LH: Does he know about you?
I haven’t sought him out. Some people wonder if it’s a racial thing, but it’s not. I reached out to my birth mother because I knew she would have feelings about giving up a child. My biological father, on the other hand, might not even know I exist. It wouldn’t feel right to intrude on his life without context. He’s had a full life and possibly other children. My son is curious, but I believe what’s meant to happen will happen.
Originally published on Oct. 9, 2014.
If you’re interested in learning about home insemination, check out this piece on artificial insemination for an insightful overview. And if you’re looking to boost your chances of conception, consider exploring fertility supplements which can provide valuable support. For those keen on navigating the world of home insemination, our blog on intracervical insemination offers helpful resources.
Summary
Lisa Harper’s journey of self-discovery began when she learned at eight years old that she was adopted. The revelation that her biological father was white shifted her understanding of race and identity. Despite the complexities of her biracial heritage, Lisa proudly identifies as Black, emphasizing the importance of cultural upbringing in shaping one’s self-esteem. Through her memoir, she reflects on her unique experiences and the societal pressures surrounding identity.
