By: Jamie Thompson
Updated: Aug. 21, 2015
Originally Published: Sep. 17, 2014
There are certain things I tell my kids that are, let’s be honest, not exactly true. But hey, their little minds are so impressionable, and they believe everything I say because, well, I’m their mom. Oh, how I cherish this stage. I almost wish time would stand still. Here are twelve fibs I tell my kids that they actually fall for:
- “I’m not going to repeat myself!” This is a classic, even though I definitely will. Somehow, I think yelling this is a power move. Spoiler alert: it’s not.
- “Alright, we’re heading to the doctor because your hearing is clearly off.” This one works like a charm. Eventually, they confess they heard me perfectly but were just pretending not to. Gotcha!
- “If you keep chewing on your hair, you’ll grow a hair tree in your tummy.” This one sometimes does the trick. But I felt a bit guilty when my daughter complained of stomach pains and said, “Mom, I think my hair tree is sprouting.”
- “That’s it! No Cape Cod trip for you!” Sure, like I’d cancel a long-awaited vacation just because they refuse to put on pants.
- “I’m calling a babysitter, and you can stay home while the rest of us have fun.” Because I have a hotline to my babysitters who can hop over in a flash, right?
- “Fine. Skip dinner. See if I care.” Occasionally, this reverse psychology works wonders. Though, by dinnertime, I might actually be too tired to care.
- “Use fewer paper towels or the paper towel police will come for you.” This one only worked once, and I got caught. “Mom, is there really a paper towel police?” Busted!
- “Wow! That’s a fantastic drawing!” Honestly, it looks like a scribble. I’m no Picasso, but I could do better.
- “Oh no! McDonald’s is closed today.” This always seems to defuse the situation. Score one for me!
- “Fine. Don’t go to school.” A fabulous example of reverse psychology. I can only hope my twins stay so enthusiastic about school!
- “Oh no. I completely forgot my wallet.” This gem came up when the ice cream truck rolls by. Why do they always have to haunt the parks?!
- “Okay, you can have 15 minutes on the iPad.” But really, that turns into a blissful hour for me to tackle dinner, fold laundry, or even schedule doctor appointments. It’s a win-win – they’re learning through games, and I get some peace.
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In summary, parenting can be a wild ride filled with a few harmless lies to make life smoother. Whether it’s coaxing kids to eat or getting them to focus, sometimes a little creativity goes a long way!