Hey there, Supermom!
Though we may not have met, I feel like I know you. I’ve been in your shoes (albeit at a snail’s pace to keep up with my little one). I’ve carried the weight of your baby carrier, feeling the pressure of my growing child digging into my hips and shoulders. I’ve navigated your minivan, stuffed full of bulky car seats, strollers, toys, diaper bags, sippy cups, and the odd Cheerio scattered throughout. I’ve shared your bed, waking up repeatedly to nurse, console, chase away nightmares, or simply remind my child that I’m there, present in their world.
I’ve experienced the highs and lows of your love.
That love—oh, that love! It can feel overwhelming, can’t it? The love that comes hand in hand with worry and frustration. The love that leaves you utterly exhausted. Motherhood is a heavy load to bear, filled with joy, fear, and everything in between. It’s a treasure trove brimming with precious moments but it’s not light, and it’s not easy. You can’t experience that immense love without its weight; they go together like peanut butter and jelly.
But, dear Mama, these early years will forge your strength. The resilience you build now will enable you to carry that love into uncharted territories. That love may feel immense and unwieldy, but trust me when I say you will shoulder it like a pro and traverse mountains. You’ll navigate turbulent waters with it tethered to your heart, taking you to breathtaking, magical, and even scary places. These formative years are conditioning you, preparing you to bear this love through anything and everything.
I get that it can be tough—sometimes really tough. But I also know that it can be indescribably beautiful, too. Motherhood is a journey of peaks and valleys, where joy dances with despair, calmness meets chaos, and you’re constantly carrying that hefty, exquisite vessel filled with hope and tenderness. It may not get lighter, but trust me—you will grow stronger.
I understand it’s hard right now, but try not to wish away this time or fantasize about a season when this love won’t challenge you. I won’t tell you to savor these days because they fly by, but I want you to realize that when everything feels heavy—that’s love training you to keep carrying it. It’s tough, no doubt, but your strength is far greater than you realize. Motherhood will reveal that to you, if it hasn’t already. The struggle is truly a blessing.
And the joy—oh, the joy! Thank goodness for it. Joy is an invaluable parenting tool, if you know how to harness it. Grab each joyful moment and hold onto it tightly until it seeps into your being. You won’t find it in every moment of motherhood, but when you do, focus on it wholeheartedly. These joyful instances serve as the straps and pulleys that make carrying that love a little easier.
And please, Mama, connect with other mothers who understand the weight of that love. Share your experiences, the beauty within, and the burdens. It’s okay to recognize both the beauty and the challenges in equal measure. No one said it would be easy. But we can support each other, rejoicing in our joys, reminding one another of our strength, and saying, “Yes, I feel you. It’s tough!” On those days when your love seems to slide down a hill with ease, you can lend your strength to a mom struggling to push hers up a mountain. We need each other, Mama. All of us.
When I reflect on my early motherhood days, I’m flooded with emotions. Those little humans are so innocent, and their potential is limitless, filled with love that’s both thrilling and anxiety-inducing. There were moments I felt the weight of that love was too much to bear, and I still feel it sometimes, even after all these years of training. But that love and I have endured a lot together. It has fortified me, and continues to strengthen me each day.
And it will empower you, too. I promise you that.
Keep going, Mama!
This article was originally published on Jan. 26, 2014.
For more insightful resources, check out the CDC’s excellent page on pregnancy and learn more about supportive tools like the at-home intracervical insemination syringe kit.