I know we’ve never really talked about your journey with fertility, and it’s always felt like a bit of a hush-hush topic in our family. But I want you to know that I see you. You and Tom tried for years to start a family before welcoming two incredible kids into your lives through adoption.
I can only imagine the heartache and tough choices you faced—should you keep trying, invest in IVF, or go down the adoption path? The emotional rollercoaster must have been intense, and you carried it all with such strength, even when it was hard to bear.
I feel a pang of guilt knowing that I’m able to get pregnant while you’ve faced this struggle. I’m sorry for the times I complained about my own journey to pregnancy; what a small hiccup that must have seemed to you. It must’ve been infuriating to hear me when you were fighting a much bigger battle. Yet, you listened and offered your unwavering support, which speaks volumes about your character.
When I first became pregnant, I didn’t realize how hard it would be for you to experience it with me. I was hurt when you missed my baby shower and didn’t want to engage with my pregnancy. I thought you were being distant, but now I see how self-centered I was. You were likely grappling with so much while I was wrapped up in my own world.
What Does It Mean to Be a Mother?
What does it really mean to have children, anyway? You may not have carried them, but you are an expert in motherhood! You’ve nurtured your kids into such thoughtful and responsible preteens. I might have done the nine-month baby-carrying gig, but I’ve learned so much from watching you navigate the ups and downs of parenting.
I worried that my pregnancy might create a rift between you and your new nephew, but the moment my son arrived, it felt like all the tension just melted away. You embraced him with such love, and I couldn’t be more grateful for that.
Now that I’m expecting again, I’ve recognized my previous missteps. I was so focused on my own excitement that I didn’t consider the weight of my words. I promise to be more mindful this time. No more texts about my “watermelon” belly or baby hiccups unless you ask. You’ve dealt with enough heartache, and I never meant to add to it.
Lastly, I’m sorry that I won’t be sending you this letter. You’ve faced enough already, and I don’t want to stir up old wounds. I’ll go through this pregnancy quietly, keeping you updated on important things like the due date and baby’s gender, while keeping the joys and discomforts to myself.
Soon, our growing family will welcome a new member, and I can’t wait for you to meet my little one. I hope they receive the same warm love you’ve shown my son. You’ve been such a fantastic aunt and sister, and while it saddens me that you can’t conceive, you’ve shown what it truly means to be a mother. You were my rock when I felt overwhelmed post-baby, and I’ll always look to you for guidance.
Now that we’re both on this journey as moms, our bond is unbreakable, and I can’t think of anyone else I’d rather share this experience with than you, Sis.
Resources for Insight
If you’re looking for some insight on home insemination, you might find helpful info at IVF Babble. And for those curious about home kits, check out Home Insemination Kit for some great resources. Also, you can explore Intracervical Insemination for additional information.
Summary
This heartfelt letter expresses love and understanding between two sisters navigating the complex journey of motherhood and fertility struggles. The author reflects on their past insensitivity, acknowledges their sister’s strength as a mother, and emphasizes the importance of their bond.