Ah, potty training! If you’re looking to transform your world into a chaotic, urine-drenched adventure, hop back on that potty training train! (I’m pretty sure you’ve had at least one potty training hiccup before. How do I know? Because… no reason, really.) Here are some witty comebacks for those well-meaning friends, relatives, and random folks who think it’s their duty to inquire about your potty training journey.
- “My daughter was trained by 18 months.” Oh, that’s impressive! I was busy introducing my kid to French and the ukulele at that age.
- “Have you considered going diaper-free?” Sure! But have you ever tried to scrub poop out of a couch?
- “When she’s ready, she’ll be ready.” Absolutely! And when she can trade it for a smartphone, she’ll be ready too.
- “Have you thought about a sticker chart?” Yes, and every time I don’t lose my mind before lunch, I get to pick my favorite superhero!
- “Have you heard of elimination communication?” Great idea! I’ll just hop into my time machine and try that when she was born.
- “What about using treats like M&Ms?” Have you seen my waistline?
- “Preschool will help with this.” Fantastic! Just curious, how much do you pay extra for teachers to mop up puddles from the floor?
- “She’ll just mimic her older brother.” Hilarious! That seems to only work for picking up bad words.
- “Using Pull-Ups worked wonders for my kid.” If your child thinks a Pull-Up is just like underwear, you might want to call Mensa!
- “It will get better!” It sure will, especially if you bring over a sponge, some cleaner, and maybe a shot of vodka!
So, when you have those delightfully well-meaning friends and family members over, make sure you’ve got these comebacks ready. And just a tip: the aroma of a freshly baked pie can almost drown out the smell of, well, accidents. So toss that store-bought pie in the oven and set it to 350. You’re welcome!
For more on parenting and home insemination, check out this resource or visit Make a Mom for expert tips. Also, consider visiting the CDC’s pregnancy page for excellent information on pregnancy and home insemination.
In summary, potty training can be a wild ride, but with humor and a few clever comebacks, you can navigate those unsolicited questions with ease while keeping a smile on your face.