The other evening, my partner kept sending texts like, “on my way,” “almost home,” and “just waiting for the bus,” and it wasn’t until nearly 7:00 that he actually walked through the door. I’m not sure if it was just my exhaustion, the kids’ crankiness, or perhaps a full moon, but by the time he arrived, I was ready to make my own exit.
I often find myself at my wit’s end. Life with little ones can swing from moments of sheer joy to utter chaos in the blink of an eye. I have a rather dramatic personality; my high moments are often followed by deep lows, all within the span of a minute.
Just the other day, my kids were enjoying some playtime together on my son’s top bunk. They were all cuddled up with their stuffed animals, giggling and wiggling around like a couple of playful puppies. My son had his little sister in fits of laughter, and she was teasing him back with gentle tickles. It was a scene straight out of a heartwarming family movie, and I felt a rush of pride for the wonderful children I was raising. Everything was perfect.
But then, in a flash, it all unraveled. The laughter turned to screams, the giggles morphed into cries, and snuggles became shoves. Toys went flying, my heart raced, and I rushed in to prevent a potential disaster off the bunk. Suddenly, both kids were in tears. In their world, it was as if the sky had fallen. At that moment, I found myself contemplating how I could just escape.
Growing up, I had a habit of quitting things I didn’t excel at. Competitive swimming, gymnastics, art classes—you name it, if I wasn’t a star, I moved on. My worldview was pretty black and white: stick to what’s enjoyable and easy. That mindset worked for me when it was just about me, and even when my husband joined the picture, it mostly held up.
Yet, the journey of motherhood has been the toughest challenge I’ve faced. I often wonder how I managed the years of sleepless nights. The overwhelming love I have for my children taught me that just because something is incredibly difficult, it doesn’t mean it’s not worth it. Those precious little ones I brought into this world, who I nurtured through tears—both theirs and mine—are mine to cherish.
I’ve come to realize that the desire to quit is perfectly normal; anyone claiming that parenthood is all rainbows and sunshine is just plain misleading. Parenting toddlers feels like being on a ferris wheel that just won’t stop. And there’s no friendly operator to hit the pause button so you can catch your breath.
What we can do is celebrate those fleeting high moments. Capture them in photos, revel in the warmth of our children’s hugs, and trace the dimples on our little one’s cheeks. We must freeze those perfect memories so we can revisit them during the chaotic times when it feels like the ferris wheel is spinning out of control again.
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Summary
The journey of motherhood can be a wild ride filled with ups and downs. While the joyful moments with our children can be heartwarming, the chaotic episodes can leave us feeling overwhelmed. Embracing the highs while learning to cope with the lows is essential for all parents.