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Parenting
The Google Search History of a 6-Year-Old Boy
By Jamie Larkson
Updated: Aug. 21, 2015
Originally Published: May 5, 2012
I can’t express enough gratitude to the genius who created parental controls for the Internet. Parenting in this digital era often leaves me in a state of panic. When my preteen son casually asked for his own smartphone, it made me consider fleeing to a simpler life—perhaps joining an Amish community. However, as (mostly) modern parents, we do allow our kids some digital freedom, but with all the necessary safeguards in place, including parental controls. And boy, am I thankful for that! Otherwise, I would have missed out on one of the most hilarious things I’ve ever encountered: my 6-year-old son’s Google search history.
My son loves to play games like Angry Birds and Dr. Panda’s Restaurant, but his favorite pastime is using the voice search feature on my partner’s phone. He can just sit there and blurt out random thoughts to see what pops up on Google. The other night, my partner walked into the room chuckling and handed me the phone, urging me to check the search history. What I found was a delightful list of a young boy’s whimsical imagination, perfectly blending attention deficit disorder with Nickelodeon vibes.
Here’s a glimpse into the mind of my son, as seen through his search history:
- 7:39 p.m. – Searched for images of Triceratops and Allosaurus (Okay, that’s pretty normal.)
- 7:39 p.m. – Searched for pictures of all the dinosaurs fighting (Wow, ambitious!)
- 7:40 p.m. – Searched for images of Bigfoot
- 7:40 p.m. – Searched for pictures of gorillas
- 7:40 p.m. – Searched for images of Batman socks (Logical progression, right?)
- 7:41 p.m. – Searched for pictures of Beethoven playing the piano (Impressive cultural interest…)
- 7:41 p.m. – Searched for pictures of Beethoven the dog playing piano (Ahh, that makes more sense.)
- 7:42 p.m. – Searched for pictures of fake girls playing piano (I thought we had some time before this…)
- 7:42 p.m. – Searched for pictures of fake gorillas playing piano (Phew! Glad he clarified.)
- 7:43 p.m. – Searched for pictures of T-Rex Godzilla (Is that like Sharknado?)
- 7:44 p.m. – Searched for pictures of T-Rex holding hands with Triceratops (Aw, so sweet.)
- 7:45 p.m. – Searched for pictures of dinosaurs all together (Kumbaya!)
- 7:46 p.m. – Searched for pictures of mutant dinosaurs fighting people (There it is!)
- 7:47 p.m. – Searched for pictures of a strong and skinny T-Rex with chains (What happened to peace and love?)
- 7:48 p.m. – Searched for pictures of a Velociraptor with muscles wearing jeans (I’d pay to see that!)
- 7:49 p.m. – Searched for pictures of all the mutant dinosaurs (He really loves mutants!)
- 7:49 p.m. – Searched for dinosaurs eating Chinese food (Imagine T-Rex with chopsticks!)
- 7:49 p.m. – Searched for pictures of mutant chickens (Why not?)
- 7:50 p.m. – Searched for a Hot Wheels guy on Captain America’s motorcycle (Too macho?)
- 7:50 p.m. – Searched for a mutant dinosaur driving the Death Star
- 7:50 p.m. – Searched for a mutant dinosaur swearing (Wait, what? Not my sweet boy!)
- 7:51 p.m. – Searched for pictures of a mutant dinosaur wearing a clone trooper helmet (Thank you!)
- 7:51 p.m. – Searched for pictures of mutant Captain America (Are superheroes not already mutants?)
- 7:52 p.m. – Searched for pictures of mutant Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles (Is there a super mutant version?)
- 7:53 p.m. – Searched for pictures of Steel Jaw the real robot
- 7:54 p.m. – Searched for pictures of dinosaur steel
- 7:55 p.m. – Searched for pictures of a dog with giant muscles (Huh?)
- 7:55 p.m. – Searched for pictures of mutant dogs (Clearly a theme!)
- 7:56 p.m. – Searched for pictures of mutant dinosaur dogs (Let’s stick with dinosaurs, please!)
- 7:56 p.m. – Searched for pictures of Yadier Molina (Not sure how he fits here, but go Cards!)
- 7:56 p.m. – Searched for pictures of mutant dinosaurs playing baseball (No Yankees, please!)
- 7:57 p.m. – Searched for pictures of human dinosaurs (Is he thinking “Larry King”?)
- 7:57 p.m. – Searched for pictures of rock people (Definitely “Larry King.”)
- 7:57 p.m. – Searched for pictures of mummies (Still “Larry King.”)
- 7:57 p.m. – Searched for pictures of babies (Aw, sweet!)
- 7:58 p.m. – Searched for pictures of babies in poopy diapers (And there it is!)
- 7:58 p.m. – Searched for pictures of Jesus carrying the cross (Props to the Catholic school!)
- 7:59 p.m. – Searched for pictures of Jim Parsons (Huh?)
- 8:00 p.m. – Searched for pictures of human baby Jim Parsons (As opposed to…?)
- 8:00 p.m. – Searched for pictures of mutant baby Jim Parsons (Guess I should have seen that coming.)
- 8:01 p.m. – Searched for pictures of really beautiful Jim Parsons (He’s quite the fan.)
- 8:01 p.m. – Searched for pictures of Godzilla lizards (Still with the Jim Parsons obsession?)
- 8:02 p.m. – Searched for pictures of skinny three-headed Godzilla nerd (Yep, still Jim Parsons.)
- 8:03 p.m. – Searched for pictures of nerds in space (When did he start watching that show?)
- 8:04 p.m. – Searched for pictures of April Fool’s mailboxes (Not touching that one!)
- 8:04 p.m. – Searched for pictures of the Kids’ Choice Awards (Nickelodeon brainwashing, indeed.)
- 8:05 p.m. – Searched for pictures of Nick Jonas in push-up suits (This seriously needs to stop.)
I can’t help but wonder where Nick Jonas would have taken his thoughts had he continued. Still, it’s pretty entertaining to get a glimpse into my son’s mind in just thirty minutes. I think I’ll be adding some dinosaur-themed items to his birthday list; he clearly has a fascination brewing.
Oh no, I just realized that when he becomes a teen, I can probably swap out “dinosaur” for “girls” and get a pretty similar insight into his thoughts. Note to self: don’t check his Google history then!
For more on family dynamics and insights, be sure to check out this blog post. If you’re on a journey towards parenthood, this resource is an excellent reference for couples. And for comprehensive information on infertility and pregnancy, visit this site.
Summary:
A mother humorously explores her 6-year-old son’s whimsical Google search history, showcasing his curiosity and interests—from dinosaurs to Jim Parsons. The amusing collection of searches paints a vivid picture of a young boy’s mind, revealing his imagination and innocence. The article reflects on the challenges and joys of parenting in the digital age, while also contemplating the changes that come with adolescence.