So, you’ve read the popular books like What to Expect When You’re Expecting and The Girlfriend’s Guide to Pregnancy. But, honestly, did they really prepare you for the whirlwind that follows delivery? My friends were sweet and kind enough to share a few tidbits, but let’s be real — they didn’t want to scare me. They probably thought, “She’s in it now; let her figure it out.” Well, I did, but just barely.
Here’s some unfiltered reality about what to expect in the hospital after your little one arrives — stuff that’s often glossed over in books, classes, or friendly chats. Buckle up, because things are about to get real.
1. Brace Yourself for the Blood
You might have heard whispers about the postpartum bleeding. Yes, those massive maxi pads and oh-so-stylish disposable underwear that even a Victoria’s Secret model couldn’t pull off exist for a reason. But let me tell you, nothing could prepare me for the sheer volume. A pad the size of an encyclopedia? Still not enough! Don’t panic, though; while it may seem like a horror movie scene, things do eventually calm down. Just accept that messes will happen.
2. Say Goodbye to Cute Sleepwear
If you thought you’d be sporting that adorable nightgown while greeting visitors, think again. The reality is that you’ll likely be leaking more than just tears, so stash away the cute PJs. Embrace the hospital gown; it’s backless, which is totally “in,” right? You’ll have plenty of time for stylish sleepwear later—trust me, you’ll practically live in pajamas for weeks (or even months) after heading home.
3. The Peeing Challenge
Did you know you’re expected to pee within an hour of giving birth? Sounds easy, right? Not when you’ve just been through the wringer down there. Your nurses will be insistent on this; if you can’t manage it, they might have to catheterize you. Seriously? After all that? It’s fair to say your lady bits have had enough excitement for one day!
4. Exhausted? You Bet!
You might know that bonding with your baby is essential, but oh boy, you can barely keep your eyes open. If you feel yourself drifting off, don’t hesitate to ask the nurses to take the baby to the nursery for a bit. Catch some Z’s when you can because the poking and prodding won’t let up anytime soon. You just birthed a tiny human, and you totally deserve a nap!
5. And Then, the Milk Arrives
It may take a bit, but soon enough, your body will start producing colostrum, often referred to as “liquid gold.” Whether you choose to breastfeed or go with formula, be prepared for some immediate decisions. And just wait until your milk comes in — hello, voluptuous boobs! Enjoy those while they last; they’re way more appealing than the blood situation.
Welcome to the beginning of sleepless nights, exhausting days, and the endless anxiety of keeping your new bundle of joy safe. You’re going to do great!
For more information on pregnancy and home insemination, check out this excellent resource: Genetics and IVF Institute.
And if you’re looking for more about home insemination, don’t forget to visit this blog post. Also, for the best kits available, you can learn more at Cryobaby’s Home Intracervical Insemination Syringe Kit.
Summary:
After delivery, expect a shocking amount of bleeding, uncomfortable hospital gowns, and the challenge of peeing post-birth. You’ll be exhausted and need to prioritize sleep, all while adapting to breastfeeding or formula feeding. Embrace the chaos, and remember, you’re not alone in this journey!