My Log Has a Message for You: Twin Peaks Returns!

My Log Has a Message for You: Twin Peaks Returns!home insemination syringe

This article contains spoilers from Episodes 1 and 2.

If you’ve always appreciated the eerie depths lurking beneath the picturesque Douglas firs and cherry pie of Twin Peaks, your devotion remains intact. For die-hard David Lynch enthusiasts—those captivated by Mulholland Drive, Eraserhead, and Inland Empire—last night’s return delivered precisely what you were hoping for. Conversely, if you prefer the more wholesome Etsy version of Twin Peaks, featuring the Log Lady and Dale Cooper contemplatively discussing Tibet, you might be in for a shock. And if you’re unfamiliar with any of the aforementioned works, the opening scenes likely lost you.

Lynch tantalizes us from the start with Dale Cooper (played by Kyle MacLachlan) navigating the enigmatic Black Lodge. Laura Palmer (Sheryl Lee) makes her appearance, echoing the iconic line, “I’ll see you again in twenty-five years,” in the Lodge’s cryptic backward speech, achieved through intricate recording techniques. As the plot unfolds, we discover that Lucy (Kimmy Robertson) has tied the knot with Deputy Andy (Harry Goaz). The Log, in the voice of the late Log Lady, Margaret (Catherine E. Coulson, who filmed her scenes prior to her passing in 2015), delivers a cryptic message to Deputy Hawk (Michael Horse), declaring, “something is missing”—and that something is essentially Dale Cooper.

In the Black Lodge, MIKE, the one-armed man (portrayed by Al Strobel), warns Cooper that he cannot escape until his doppelgänger returns. This poses a significant dilemma, as Doppelgänger Coop, resembling a slick Bruce Campbell, is wreaking havoc across multiple states. He dismissively informs his underage companion that he has no intentions of returning to the Black Lodge. He embodies Cooper’s traits but lacks the compassion, resulting in a spree of heartless violence. The characters he slays feel like mere props, serving only to illustrate that this version of Coop is a true monster. It appears he may have even murdered a librarian in South Dakota.

Interspersed throughout the chaos are two bizarre scenes: a character (Ben Rosenfield) in New York City is assigned to observe a top-secret 19th-century scientific glass box. Despite the restrictions, he allows his girlfriend (Madeline Zima) to sneak in. After a brief intimate encounter, he glimpses a terrifying shadow within the box. Later, Dale Cooper inexplicably drops into the box, but finds it eerily empty.

Meanwhile, the dead librarian in South Dakota was undiscovered for three days before authorities break in, only to find her lifeless body with a gunshot wound to the eye—and an unrecognizable body beneath the covers. The principal (Matthew Lillard) is soon apprehended, and his alibi crumbles as evidence of his affair with the librarian surfaces. His wife’s infidelity with his lawyer complicates matters further. In classic Twin Peaks style, the narrative blurs the lines between police procedural and soap opera.

Where do we go from here? Likely deeper into Lynch’s twisted vision, as we catch fleeting glimpses of familiar faces: the episode concludes with Shelly (Mädchen Amick) and James (James Marshall) exchanging glances across the dance floor at the Bang Bang Bar. Hawk must confront the forces of the Black Lodge to rescue Coop, and the owls will prove to be more than they appear.

Memorable Quotes:

  • “Is it future or is it past?” — One-Armed Mike
  • “Stop by. I have coffee and pie for you.” — The Log Lady
  • “I am the evolution of the arm. This is what I sound like.” — Breathing tree with a talking flesh nub
  • “I feel like I know her but sometimes my arms bend back.” — Laura Palmer

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In summary, Twin Peaks’ return immerses viewers in its signature mix of surrealism, dark humor, and layered storytelling, promising an intriguing exploration of both old and new mysteries.

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