I found myself in my office arranging a spa day for my wife, Laura, for Mother’s Day. I was familiar with where she liked to go — well, I didn’t know the name of the establishment, but I had a decent idea of its location. I wasn’t quite sure what services she usually selected either, but I did know that she always returned glowing and looking fantastic. So, armed with Google, I managed to find the contact number and soon found myself on the phone with a young woman. There I was, a father of three in my mid-30s, asking what I was sure were rather silly questions, while she stifled her laughter.
My grand plan was to surprise Laura the Saturday before Mother’s Day. I intended to book her favorite treatments at her go-to spa and then casually say, “Go enjoy yourself; I’ll take care of the kids. You deserve this.” Afterward, we’d have a nice dinner together. I even discussed my plan with a colleague, who suggested I reach out to her husband for some hints on what Laura would like.
I felt confident until I found myself on the phone asking things like, “What exactly is a facial?” and “How does a pedicure work?” and “Do they wax the whole face or just the eyebrows?” This was when the giggles started. And yes, those were legitimate questions. I had no clue what any of it entailed. While the woman on the line might have been amused by my awkwardness as a well-meaning husband, it didn’t feel that way to me. I could feel my cheeks flush with embarrassment as we spoke.
That being said, I don’t regret my effort to find Laura’s favorite spa and figure out what she enjoys. My point is that I was stepping way outside my comfort zone. I’ve never had a facial or a pedicure myself, nor have I ever had my eyebrows waxed (although I probably should; they resemble two hairy caterpillars). I’ve cut my own hair for years. So, despite my questions being potentially silly, I genuinely wanted to ensure Laura received what she desired. I wanted to know how long she would be gone so I could make dinner reservations accordingly. So, I resolved to ask.
A few moments into the call, with my forehead resting in my hands, elbows on the desk, I sensed someone observing me. Turning my chair, I spotted the office intern smiling at me, phone in hand. She was in her early 20s, bright-eyed, and hardworking. We shared an office space. I raised my hand to ask her to stop, but it was too late; she had already posted it on Snapchat.
Looking back, the whole scenario is undeniably amusing, and some might even find it heartwarming. However, that’s not the core of this story. I’ve been married for 13 years to a wonderful woman, and I would do anything for her. I want her to be happy and feel valued. I don’t want to be one of those husbands who forgets special occasions, because I know how important they are. Laura is an incredible mother who deserves something special on Mother’s Day. Yet, these efforts sometimes lead to situations where I try to do the right thing but end up feeling utterly embarrassed and out of place.
I’m not suggesting that wives should shower their husbands with praise every time they step out of their comfort zones. That’s not my point. What I am saying is that it often requires significant effort and a bit of awkwardness to arrange a day at the spa or similar thoughtful gifts. Behind that meticulously planned surprise, there might be a story of your husband grappling with his nerves on the phone, all while a young intern records the moment. Yet, he persevered. He didn’t hang up or opt for a cash gift with a wink; he set aside his pride and did what he knew you deserved because you mean that much to him.
There’s a lot of love in that. There seems to be a misconception that a man’s expressions of love should be grand and heroic, like conquering dragons or defending his partner’s honor. But in reality, love can often look like a man in work boots awkwardly standing at a florist, or a guy from the office buying feminine hygiene products, his face flushed yet determined.
This isn’t to say that women don’t step outside their comfort zones for the men they adore—they certainly do. However, these moments of dedication from loving husbands aren’t always acknowledged. They often go unnoticed when the gift is presented. And I believe they should be recognized. As soon as I hung up from that spa call, I stepped outside to gather myself, taking a deep breath to shake off the embarrassment. Once my mind cleared, I thought about Laura and how thrilled she would be with my surprise. And I realized she was absolutely worth all the awkwardness, even if everyone was laughing at my expense on Snapchat.
Conclusion
In conclusion, thoughtful gestures often come with their share of discomfort, but the love behind them is what truly counts. For further insights on home insemination and family planning, check out our other blog posts here. You might also find valuable information at Make a Mom, a trusted source for related topics, as well as the CDC for excellent resources on pregnancy.