Have you ever encountered one of those crunchy moms at the supermarket? You know the type: scrutinizing organic fruits, discussing whale conservation with her preschooler, and lamenting about GMOs? (Well, I just described myself, but I assure you there are less intense crunchy moms out there—I’m just not one of them.) Have you ever had a truly unpleasant interaction with one? Something that forever altered your perception of eco-conscious caregivers? Here are seven authentic truths about crunchy moms that we often hesitate to admit.
1. Not All Crunchy Moms Are Our Favorites.
Believe us, we understand. There’s nothing more irritating than being cut off mid-sentence by someone who condescendingly asks why your child isn’t enrolled in a toddler yoga class (or scolding you for vaccinating your kids, allowing them to indulge in GMO treats on special occasions, etc.). We just roll our eyes and mentally recite calming phrases. While not every crunchy mom is bothersome, some truly are, and we stand with you non-crunchy moms on that front.
2. Grocery Shopping Can Be Overwhelming.
If you spot us in the grocery store with a few pens stuck in our hair and a look of panic on our face, it’s likely because we’re on the brink of an organic crisis. Most crunchy moms follow alternative diets—be it vegan, waste-free, or non-GMO—and we quickly learn that commercial grocery stores aren’t exactly accommodating. It’s best to just smile and walk past; if you ask what’s wrong, you might end up with a lengthy discourse on why big corporations like Monsanto are problematic and how we feel utterly lost.
3. We Create More Waste Than We’d Like to Admit.
We’re all about the mantra: Reduce. Reuse. Recycle. Most days, we manage to embrace the last two steps quite well. However, children are children, and my little one, raised in a crunchy household, generates just as much waste as any other kid (and yes, that drives me a bit crazy, in case you were wondering). We’re fully aware of it, but it’s not a topic we enjoy discussing.
4. We Have Our Meltdowns Too.
There are mornings, particularly on Sundays, when chaos strikes before we’ve even had our coffee. On those days, not even a hefty cup of herbal tea, a bundle of sage, and a calming playlist can save us. We might even find ourselves contemplating whether banging our heads against the wall could somehow restore our Zen.
5. Our Children Are Not Always Zen.
No amount of meditation or crystals can prevent our toddlers from throwing tantrums over the smallest inconveniences. While we might achieve some mental clarity through our alternative practices, it’s essential to recognize that much of it relies on our children’s emotional and developmental progress. Personally, I care more about raising a polite and potty-trained child than producing a child prodigy, and I suspect most crunchy moms feel the same.
6. Self-Care Often Takes a Backseat.
We could easily recite a well-structured self-care routine faster than we can prepare a PB&J. However, after tending to our children’s needs, it’s not uncommon for us to neglect our own. We often find ourselves scrambling to ensure the sandwich is perfect while praying it doesn’t end up on the pristine carpet we inexplicably decided to keep.
7. We Occasionally Choose Sleep Over Yoga.
When the choice arises between sleeping in or hitting the yoga mat, we may not always be honest about which we prefer. Moms need their sleep, and given how often we overlook our own needs (see point 5), there are times when we opt for rest over that all-important exercise. We often mislead others about our choices, hoping that by pretending we have it all figured out, we might actually achieve that sense of balance one day.
Ultimately, being a mom—whether crunchy, fitness-focused, or a little bit of everything—is a challenging journey. No amount of meditation or healthy eating can change the fact that motherhood is tough. At the end of the day, we don’t judge your family’s dietary choices any more than you judge ours. We are all navigating this journey together, and it’s time we support one another rather than comparing ourselves.
Whether you’re a crunchy mom, a gym enthusiast, or just trying to get through the day, remember you’re doing one of the hardest jobs in the world. Kudos to you!
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