Some folks manage to juggle it all during the most wonderful time of the year — I, however, am not one of those people. I’ve given it my best shot; truly, I have. I adore the holidays. If Martha Stewart and Buddy the Elf had a child, I’d be their offspring. From decorating and baking to blasting Christmas tunes starting Halloween night, I do it all with passion. And yes, I’m ready to fend off pitchfork-wielding critics because I do it for the sheer joy it brings me.
But over the years, I’ve learned the hard way (as most of us do) that trying to do everything can suck the joy right out of the season. So now, I focus my energy on what truly matters, the activities that bring my family the most happiness. I refuse to stretch myself too thin and stress everyone out during this time.
The holidays should be about gratitude and togetherness, free from anything that drains the joy meant to be cherished. So, I’ve created a few new traditions that let me kick back, sip eggnog straight from the carton, and spend less time in tears over burnt cookies.
New Traditions
A few years back, the women in my family collectively decided to ditch the gift exchange. With our families expanding and the number of nieces and nephews multiplying, it became overwhelming. Instead of racing from store to store trying to find the perfect gift, we now spend quality time together. Our favorite activity is a girls’ dinner where no one has to worry about cooking or cleaning up. I also host a cookie swap (store-bought cookies in pajamas are totally acceptable), where we indulge in sugar and wine while belting out tunes in my living room. Trust me, you haven’t lived until you’ve seen our rendition of “The 12 Days of Christmas.” Rockettes, who?
With the time and money saved from not buying gifts, we can engage in more meaningful activities. I love taking my kids to the local country store to pick a name from the Angel Tree. We’ve been doing this for nearly a decade, and it teaches my children gratitude like nothing else. We also donate holiday dinners to food banks, support St. Jude with a hefty check, and pay for strangers behind us in the drive-thru. My favorite act was surprising a lovely lady at our go-to burger joint who frequently complimented my bracelet. I bought her one and counted down the days until I could gift it. I think I cracked and gave it to her just two days after Thanksgiving.
Letting Go of Stress
We’ve let go of some stress-inducing traditions, like sending out holiday cards. While I know many find joy in this, it felt more like a chore for me. So, I decided to skip it altogether.
It’s perfectly fine to let go of traditions that no longer bring joy or fit your family’s needs.
During the holidays, I want to savor every moment. I want to drive around in our pajamas, sipping cocoa, and admire the Christmas lights. I long to dive into my recipe box and create a delightful mess in the kitchen with my kids, indulging in raw cookie dough and frosting. I know the cookies won’t be perfect, and my son will inevitably add a few “extra” features to his gingerbread man — and I can’t wait for it.
I love browsing Pinterest and dreaming about all the projects I might tackle. If I don’t get to them all, so what? The excitement is often in the dreaming. And while I enjoy a festive party, I might skip a few in favor of cozy nights at home. There’s something special about unwinding next to the Christmas tree, with my kids asleep and my dogs nestled at my feet.
Sometimes, real magic is found in the quiet moments. It can’t be forced; it’s in the kitchen while you recreate your great-grandmother’s cookie recipe. It’s the warmth of a stranger’s smile when you do something kind. It’s watching your eccentric aunt sing carols with your son, reminding you of the love you felt when you were young.
I can’t appreciate the little magic around me if I’m rushing from store to store, trying to buy things for people who already have more than enough. Keeping pace with everything leaves me too drained to experience the joy I want. Holidays should be a time for everyone to enjoy, however they choose to celebrate.
Letting go of unnecessary obligations to make room for what truly matters is the best gift you can give yourself and your family. I promise.
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Summary
The holiday season doesn’t have to be about doing it all. By letting go of less meaningful traditions and focusing on what truly brings joy, families can create cherished memories. Embrace the magic of simple moments, enjoy time together, and prioritize what matters most.