Hey there! Yes, you in that comfy, stretched-out T-shirt and those elastic-waist pants. You, who’s managing to get by without a shower and trying to disguise that greasy hair with a messy bun. You, who might have a questionable stain on your shirt—could be food, could be snot—who really knows at this point?
I see you, and I get it. Motherhood can feel like a heavy weight pulling you down. You devote so much time to everyone else that your own needs seem to disappear into the ether, lost somewhere far away. A shower where you can actually take your time? That feels like a dream. Curling your hair or spending longer than two minutes on makeup? Ha! Some days, just running a brush through your hair feels like a monumental task. I know you’re wondering, “What’s the point?”
You might feel like you’ve let yourself go, and a little voice in your head worries that your partner might not find you as attractive anymore. But let’s be real—after a long day of giving everything to others, the last thing on your mind is intimacy. Sleep? Now that sounds heavenly.
If someone handed you a hundred bucks, there’s a good chance you’d walk into a store and spend it all on your kids. Sure, you might pick up a little something for yourself, but let’s be honest—you’d probably put it back before hitting the checkout. Your money is now devoted to your little ones: the mommy-and-me classes, toys, books, and all those outings to the zoo, carnival, or museum. You tell yourself those things matter more, and honestly, who wants to invest in bigger jeans when yoga pants are so forgiving?
You often think back to the person you used to be before motherhood swept you off your feet. While you wouldn’t trade being a mom for anything, you still yearn for that pre-kids version of yourself. But she’s not gone forever, I promise you that.
Right now, you’re navigating the beautiful chaos of loving and nurturing another human being. Balancing your needs with the demands of a tiny human who relies on you for everything is no small feat. It’s a delicate dance, and sadly, your needs might take a back seat for a while. But guess what? That’s okay because you’re a phenomenal mom.
It might take time—maybe a lot of time—but eventually, your little ones will need less from you. Bit by bit, you’ll reclaim your focus. You’ll find time for that long-overdue self-care: de-fuzzing your bikini line, waxing your eyebrows, and doing something just for you. You’ll start to catch glimpses of that woman you used to be—first fleeting, then more frequent—until one day, you realize she’s back! Sure, she’s changed because she’s now someone’s mom, but that just makes her a richer, fuller version of herself.
The baby and toddler years are tough, and expecting to come out unscathed is like thinking you can run through a rainstorm without getting wet—it’s not realistic. But remember, this season is temporary. Just like the sun eventually shines after the rain, your mojo will return, glimmering and bright.
To read more about family-building options, check out this excellent resource here. And if you’re interested in home insemination, you can find more information on this blog post.
Summary:
Motherhood can feel overwhelming, leaving little room for self-care. However, it’s essential to remember that this is a temporary phase. As your children grow, you’ll gradually regain your sense of self, finding time for self-care and rediscovering the person you once were. Embrace this journey, knowing your sparkle will return.