If you want the fun, easygoing version of your mom back, it’s time for a chat.
Lately, I’ve turned into a bit of a drill sergeant. I find myself issuing commands like “Time to brush those teeth!” “Lunch needs packing!” “Can we get some clothes on, please?” “Don’t forget the deodorant; we don’t want any unpleasant surprises!” My voice has become the loud background music to the chaos of morning routines, and I can only imagine how charming I must seem to your dad while he’s trying to tune in to the latest headlines.
Yes, I’ve morphed into “that” mom—the one who pops up in sitcoms, the one who enforces rules like, “No going out until your room is clean!” and “Cleaning up those Legos right this minute is non-negotiable!” I’ve even heard the complaints that “Dad is way cooler than you, Mom.” Honestly, I’m not fazed. I consider it part of my job—one I signed up for nearly 18 years ago when I chose to stay home with you.
With your dad’s long hours and commute, it falls on me to keep the household running smoothly. Sure, I lay down the law, but I also get to share in the wonderful moments of watching you grow. However, since my kids—now 17, 14, and 11—have started to call me “Mean Mom” more often, I’ve realized I miss my cheerful self. So, here’s the deal: if you want “Nice Mom” back, here’s what needs to happen.
1. It’s Okay to Dislike Me
First off, it’s perfectly acceptable to dislike me. I understand the world can be tough, and sometimes you need a target. Just remember to keep it civil. If you need to express your frustrations, try something like, “Dear Mother, the rule about not ending my brother’s existence because he ‘accidentally’ obliterated my precious CD collection feels dreadfully unfair. I’ll retreat to my room to contemplate life.” Trust me, if you express yourself respectfully, I’ll return the favor, and you might find yourself grounded less often.
2. Listen the First Time
When I ask you to do something, let’s try to make it happen the first time I say it. I know it’s part of your teen and preteen charm to push back, but if you want a more pleasant mom, being a kinder kid would go a long way. I encourage you to help yourselves in the kitchen, but if I walk in to what looks like a disaster zone, my voice might elevate a bit—so don’t say, “I was just going to clean it!”
3. Meal Time Manners
And let’s talk about meals. We need to eat like civilized people (you know who you are). If that doesn’t happen, I’ll have to ask you to leave the table. I might joke about your great-grandmother fainting in heaven after witnessing your pasta-eating antics, but don’t expect that to last.
4. Mornings Shouldn’t Be a Surprise
Lastly, mornings shouldn’t be a surprise attack. You know you need to get dressed, brush your teeth, and wash up for school. If you don’t want me to raise my voice in the morning, then it’s time to get yourself ready. I somehow manage to do it every day with little sleep, mind you.
If you follow these simple guidelines, I promise the easier-going, less-stressed version of your mom will return—after she’s had that all-important morning coffee, of course.
Much love,
Mom