Parenting
By Julia Thompson
For the first decade of our parenting experience, we raised our children in bustling cities—Los Angeles and New York City, to be specific. When our oldest was nearing 14 and our youngest just 5, we made the leap to a small college town with a population of around 30,000, where a significant portion are students, surrounded by sprawling farmland. The nearest sizable city is a good hour and a half drive away. While it’s not a one-stoplight town, moving here was certainly a major shift from urban life.
I felt a mix of excitement and anxiety about the transition. My childhood was spent in a tiny town, and my partner grew up in a community of just 8,000. Honestly, the downsides of small-town living seemed to far outweigh the benefits based on our previous experiences. However, not all small towns are the same, and our new location offers much more than the places we grew up in. After two years here, I’ve uncovered some wonderful aspects of raising kids in a smaller community, along with a few challenges I wish we could address.
The Benefits of Raising Kids in a Small Town:
Safety
It was a bit strange to settle in a town where many of my neighbors leave their doors unlocked when they go out. While it’s certainly not without risks, the crime rate here is remarkably low compared to even the safer suburbs of NYC. It’s a comforting luxury to enjoy.
Traffic
I didn’t realize just how much time we wasted in Los Angeles traffic. In our town, you can drive from one end to the other in about 10 minutes. There’s another town about 15 minutes away with more shopping and dining options, and we venture 30 minutes to reach a larger city for Costco. We hardly ever sit in traffic. Here, “rush hour” is merely a 15-minute delay—it’s refreshing!
Community
While we had plenty of family and friends in the city, they were scattered across different neighborhoods. The sense of close-knit community that small towns offer is quite appealing. Even in our university town, which has a lot of transient residents, the community spirit is strong, and the local networking is wonderful.
Simplicity
I worried about leaving behind the endless activities found in the big city, but it turns out that having fewer options can be beneficial. With a limited number of museums, parks, and extracurricular activities to choose from, life feels more straightforward. There’s less decision fatigue, making our outings more enjoyable.
The Drawbacks of Raising Kids in a Small Town:
Lack of Diversity
Living in a college town does provide some cultural diversity, but it’s still not comparable to the rich variety found in a major city. Without the university, our town could be quite homogenous. It’s essential for us that our kids grow up with a broad range of experiences, so we actively seek out cultural events at the university to expand their worldview.
Fewer Opportunities
While having limited choices can simplify life, there are times when my kids express interest in sports or activities that aren’t available here. We can usually find most things, but not everything. Want to be a trapeze artist? Sorry, kid! Interested in the opera? That’s a 90-minute drive away. Major concerts? Five hours out.
Missing the City
There’s a certain magic to city life. Even though I don’t miss the crowds or traffic, I sometimes long for the sight of the iconic skyline lit up at night. I miss spending entire days exploring the city and the vibrant energy that comes with it. It was always thrilling to take the kids on the train into the city.
Less Complexity
While simplicity has its place in childhood, complexity is essential too. I often think about the experiences our kids are missing out on—like navigating public transportation, engaging with world-class arts, and understanding economic disparities. Are we doing them a disservice by moving away from the intricacies of city life?
Ultimately, every place has its pros and cons. It’s nearly impossible to find a location that meets all a family’s needs. I’m grateful to have experienced both city and small-town life, allowing us to appreciate the benefits and drawbacks of each. I don’t believe one option is superior; regardless of where we live, we can ensure our kids thrive. We can help them adapt to their surroundings and expose them to various lifestyles, equipping them with the skills to flourish wherever they go after leaving home. And whether in a bustling city or a quaint town, we can create a loving home they’ll always want to return to.
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Summary:
Raising children in a small town can offer several advantages, including enhanced safety, less traffic, a strong sense of community, and a simpler lifestyle. However, it also comes with challenges such as limited diversity, fewer opportunities for activities, and a longing for the vibrancy of city life. Each environment has unique benefits and drawbacks, but what matters most is creating a nurturing home for children to grow and learn.