Ah, the PTA. Or as I like to refer to it, the PT&A (I’m here all week, don’t forget to tip your servers!). It’s a necessary evil that helps get things done, and those amazing parents who spend countless hours improving our kids’ schools truly deserve medals—and an endless supply of wine. And even more wine if they promise not to enlist our help!
Joining the PTA is a major commitment. You thought sleepless nights with a newborn was the toughest part of parenting, but who could have predicted that you’d find yourself at the school Halloween dance, manning the pizza booth, praying for a quick escape? It’s not glamorous, but someone has to step up—and the funny folks on Twitter know you’d prefer that someone not be you.
- A bad decision?
What am I doing here? And why is there no vodka? - Patience is key.
You might need a few years to get everyone on your level. Become an influencer—it’s worth a shot! - Brilliant!
Everyone says “yay.” Next topic, please. - Spot on.
“Can I borrow a pen?” is my go-to icebreaker for meeting new moms in all school scenarios, and the PTA is no exception. - Gain new skills!
Totally worth it. - *switches account to private*
Get ready! You’re about to be asked to buy candles, essential oils, seaweed body wraps, purses, soaps, and weight loss shakes. You’ve been warned! - Oh, how things change!
Bring back that old ringtone. When it goes off in the meeting, look around to see who’s jamming along. Boom! Your new mom BFF. - Just breathe.
The PTA might not be the ideal place to channel your inner (slightly tipsy) Al Pacino. Wait, on second thought, it’s actually the perfect venue for that! - Standard practice.
It’s either blood or 40 volunteer hours. Can someone help me roll up my sleeve and tighten this tourniquet real quick? - Awkward moments.
What? It was the truth. - Disable those read receipts.
Or maybe just mark the president as spam? Just a thought. - Just take my money already.
Ugh, participation. So gross. - Boo!
Don’t forget to groan occasionally to maintain the facade.
This article originally appeared on September 15, 2016.
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In summary, the PTA is a necessary yet humorous part of parenting, filled with awkward moments and unexpected challenges. The dedicated parents who volunteer their time truly deserve all the support and appreciation they can get.