Every morning, I rise with a singular mission: to conquer my to-do list. “Today’s the day I’m going to tackle everything on it!” I tell myself. I’m ready to be productive and feel a sense of accomplishment. But then, of course, I remember my promise to cut out sugar, and well, you can guess how that went.
Some days are a triumph. I make significant progress on my endless list of tasks. But more often than not, as night falls, I find myself staring at a pile of clean laundry that’s been sitting in the basket for days. I think about that phone call I should have made, and I mentally kick myself for not scrubbing the toilet… yet again (fingers crossed nobody drops by!).
We create to-do lists to manage the countless tasks that would otherwise overwhelm our minds. Lists can be helpful for organization, and yes, some tasks have to be completed by a certain time (like that preschool registration form I keep forgetting about… hold on, let me take care of that).
However, it’s the imaginary deadlines we impose on ourselves for each task, no matter how minor, that really get us down. We feel the pressure to check everything off, as if we’re racing against an invisible clock that always seems to be moving too fast. Why do we do this? Sure, it would be nice to have the laundry folded on time, but if it doesn’t happen, no one is going to suffer. Missing a clean shirt from the drawer instead of the basket isn’t going to ruin anyone’s day. A few wrinkles seem trivial compared to the mental stress we could spare by not stressing over trivial things.
The unspoken demands we place on ourselves are just a part of why we need to give ourselves a break regarding our to-do lists. Think about all the tasks we complete that never even make it onto the list. I’ve never written down “spend 20 minutes scraping gum off the carpet” or “clean up after the dog” or even the usual chores like “do the dishes” or “change the sheets.” If our lists truly reflected everything we accomplished, they would be much longer — and we would have many more ticks next to completed tasks.
Yet, we ignore these unlisted tasks that consume our days, only focusing on what’s written down. And heaven forbid we leave any item unchecked! Instead of appreciating what we have achieved, we tend to berate ourselves for not doing enough, leading to exhaustion and a lack of motivation.
Consider how sports teams thrive on cheers and encouragement. If there were only booing in the stands, the team would falter. So why should we treat ourselves any differently? How much can we realistically expect from ourselves when we are our own harshest critics? If anyone else spoke to us the way we speak to ourselves, we would find it abusive. So, why should we accept such negativity from our own thoughts?
Even if we don’t complete everything on our list, we deserve to acknowledge our small victories and, if needed, set a gentler goal for tomorrow. This becomes much easier when we don’t carry the heavy burden of self-imposed perfectionism.
We accomplish so much every day. If you’re unsure, try doing absolutely nothing for a couple of days and watch how quickly things around the house fall apart.
Remember: Screw you, to-do list. I’ll get to what I can when I can.
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Summary:
This article discusses the pressure we put on ourselves with to-do lists and the imaginary deadlines we create. It emphasizes the importance of acknowledging our daily accomplishments, even if they aren’t formally listed, and encourages a kinder internal dialogue. The piece advocates for reducing stress by letting go of unrealistic expectations and recognizing that we do enough every day.