In recent months, we’ve witnessed a relentless wave of challenges to women’s reproductive rights. As a woman and a mother who has personally depended on these rights, the thought of them being eroded is deeply unsettling. Here’s why reproductive rights hold profound significance for me: I am a mom who faced the heart-wrenching decision of having a second-trimester abortion.
My family and I were living in California when I became pregnant again; our son was just two years old, and we were thrilled to expand our family. After a successful first attempt, I became pregnant and we celebrated the joyful news with our loved ones—another boy was on the way! Although I experienced some spotting, the initial ultrasounds gave us hope, and everything seemed fine. However, during a follow-up ultrasound at 16 weeks, our world changed dramatically. The technician’s silence during the exam raised alarms, and when the doctor came in, my heart sank.
She delivered the devastating news: my unborn child had bilateral multicystic dysplastic kidneys, meaning neither kidney had formed properly. Without functioning kidneys, he could not produce amniotic fluid, which was critical for his development. The harsh reality set in: we faced a choice between ending the pregnancy, waiting to see if it would end on its own, or enduring the unimaginable pain of a stillbirth.
After much deliberation, my husband and I made the heartbreaking decision to terminate the pregnancy. We opted for a follow-up ultrasound to confirm our choice, and witnessing the condition of the kidneys—clusters of cysts—was gut-wrenching. The doctor informed us that our son would not be able to survive if the pregnancy continued. This was our sole parenting decision for this child, and we needed to make it count.
Waiting over a week for the procedure was emotionally exhausting. I still felt pregnant, and every kick reminded me of the impending loss. Amid this turmoil, a compassionate doctor said, “Be grateful you live in a state that allows you this choice.” It struck me then that in other states, I could have faced even more challenges or been outright denied the ability to make this crucial decision for my family. I could have been forced to carry my son to term, risking my health and potentially witnessing his suffering. The thought was unbearable.
At 18 weeks, we said goodbye to our son. While I would never wish anyone to endure the pain of terminating a wanted pregnancy, I am thankful for the opportunity to do so in a supportive and safe environment. This experience underscored for me just how vital reproductive rights are.
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In summary, living in a state that respects and upholds reproductive rights has allowed me to navigate one of the most challenging experiences of my life with dignity. It’s a privilege that I do not take lightly.