Recently, a viral video showcased men reading some of the harsh tweets directed at two female reporters. This clip highlights the ongoing, painful reality of online harassment that many of us are all too familiar with. I’ve watched it multiple times, feeling frustrated as I observed these brave women enduring cruel comments while some men awkwardly recited them.
Online harassment is nothing new. As a woman, I’ve learned to brace myself against attacks for simply voicing my opinions. Thus, the content of the video didn’t shock me; rather, it infuriated me that our society has normalized such verbal abuse online.
After the video circulated, several friends—mostly men, but a few women too—reached out to share their apologies: “I’m so sorry if you’ve ever faced this.” “I can’t imagine what you experience when you publish your work.” “Is this really the reality?” While their intentions were good, I remained unfazed. If you’re a woman, whether cis or trans, and you’ve used social media extensively, you’re likely familiar with the barrage of vile comments that often accompany your online presence.
I’ve been insulted in countless ways, told I’m unattractive and will die alone. Some have even taken jabs at my parenting, claiming that I’m raising a terrible child and that he’d have been better off if I had never given birth. Such remarks don’t particularly wound me; perhaps it’s because I grew up with a verbally abusive father, which has dulled the sting of cruel words from strangers.
What struck me most was a friend’s suggestion that men should imagine saying such things to their mothers or wives before sending them to women online. This notion left me bewildered. Why should a woman’s worth be contingent on her relationship to the men around her? A woman should not need to be someone’s mother, sister, or spouse to be treated with respect and kindness.
The idea that empathy for women should stem from familial ties is fundamentally flawed. It implies that if a woman doesn’t provide you with pleasure or value in some way, she is deserving of mistreatment. This reasoning is something I can’t support, even though many people I respect believe in it.
The truth is, I don’t belong to every man who disagrees with me online; I’m not a wife, mother, sister, or daughter to all of them. My identity as a woman stands apart from those roles, and it certainly doesn’t justify the harassment I or any other woman must endure.
In essence, kindness and respect should not be conditional. You shouldn’t need to envision a woman as a loved one to treat her with dignity. It’s vital to recognize that every woman is inherently deserving of respect, regardless of any personal connection.
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Summary
This article discusses the issue of online harassment faced by women and critiques the idea that empathy should be based on personal relationships. It emphasizes the importance of recognizing every woman’s inherent dignity and worth, regardless of her connection to others.