“Mrs. T? This is your son’s principal, Ms. B. Don’t be alarmed; your son is alright, but I wanted to inform you about an incident that occurred yesterday involving him.”
My heart plummeted. I could barely respond, my mind racing.
“Okay.”
I learned that my son had been bullied. Bullied. A “victim,” as she described him. My son—my kind, intelligent, and gentle boy.
While waiting in line with his class, a boy he mentors, who struggles with various issues, kicked him three times. My son turned to say “stop it!” but instead received three swift kicks to his groin. Anger surged within me, and I took a moment to breathe deeply, questioning how I could have overlooked this. Why hadn’t he told me about it when it happened? Having heard numerous stories about bullying, I was left bewildered, wondering what I had missed.
The principal continued, explaining that after the boy kicked him, my son firmly told him to “stop it” one last time before running to his teacher, where he broke down and shared what had just happened.
The school administration handled it commendably. His teacher promptly emailed the principal, the other boy received a serious reprimand, and my son was comforted by his teacher. The principal hadn’t seen the email until the next morning, the very day she called me. She invited my son to her office and shared their conversation along with her personal reflections:
“I must tell you, woman to woman, as a mother of two sons to another, your boy is incredibly special. We’ve dealt with numerous bullying incidents and have had to intervene in many fights, but your son stands out. He took matters into his own hands and communicated with words rather than resorting to violence. When he sat in my office recounting the event, I was struck by his confidence in his choice. Do you know why? Because it was the right choice.
He is remarkably mature for his age, and I was genuinely impressed by his self-esteem. You should be very proud of him. He confided in me that he hadn’t yet shared this with you or your husband and permitted me to discuss it with you. He’s truly exceptional, and you’re clearly doing something right.”
I was left speechless. Sure, I impart therapeutic wisdom to him daily, but what struck me was how he responded in that moment of pain and embarrassment. That’s the essence of who my child is.
Hearing about his commendable reaction dulled my initial pain for a moment, but it soon returned as I replayed the incident in my mind. The idea of my sweet child being mistreated or hurt by anyone fills me with anguish.
When I picked him up from school, his face beamed as our eyes met. The familiar scent of his skin, reminiscent of Crayola crayons and home, made me want to envelop him in my arms. I longed to apologize for the hurt he experienced the day before, wishing to shield him from the world’s cruelty.
I held his hand and mentioned that I had heard about the incident. With a calm demeanor, he looked up at me, his eyes glinting in the sunlight, and replied, “Yeah, I thought so, Mom. Everything’s okay.”
Where does this strength come from? I wondered. How do I maintain my composure?
At home, I asked if he wanted to discuss it, and he readily complied, perhaps more to humor me than anything else. I could see the confidence his principal had mentioned. After he finished, I inquired, “What made you choose to respond that way?” He replied, “Because that’s what you taught me to do, Mom. And it was the right thing to do.”
He spoke about the other boy by name, expressing sympathy for him due to his struggles in class. “I feel bad that he won’t get to enjoy the fun days at school like we do, because he’s always missing recess for his behavior. But don’t worry, Mom—he won’t do anything like that to me again. We talked, and he knows it’s not okay.”
I knelt down to his level, showering him with kisses, hugs, and praise. He looked me in the eyes and said, “I have to help him the way you help the kids at work as a therapist. I was going to tell you, but I was tired of talking about it yesterday, so I needed a break.”
I held him tightly, not wanting to let go.
Before bed, he came into my room to spend time with me. I dropped everything to sit with him, to laugh, and to share stories. As we held hands, he traced the wrinkles on my palms with his fingers.
He fell asleep clinging to me, as if I held the key to all his dreams, and I held him back, knowing he truly does.
I love him beyond words and feel immense pride in who he is becoming—a wise, compassionate person with a heart full of kindness.
Yet, what fills me with the greatest pride is the person he reveals himself to be when I’m not around. He shows me his true character when he believes no one is watching, and I couldn’t be more honored to be his mother.
Parenting is a challenging journey, but he is absolutely worth it—a million times over.
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Summary:
This article recounts a mother’s experience when she learns her son was bullied. The principal praises his mature response, highlighting the importance of communication over violence. The mother reflects on her son’s compassion and strength while emphasizing the pride she feels in his character development. The narrative illustrates the complexities of parenting and the emotional growth that occurs in challenging situations.