With my birthday just around the corner, I’ve decided to treat myself to a day filled with delightful antics that will surely drive my partner, Mark, up the wall. As a special gift to me, he’s sworn to keep his complaints and eye rolls to himself. Here’s my list of birthday indulgences (which I may add to at any moment):
- Leave every bathroom cabinet and dresser drawer wide open, while scattering at least three pairs of flip-flops all over the house.
- Call him repeatedly at work, then on his cell, and back to the office phone again just to ask what he feels like for dinner. Who cares if he’s in the middle of an important meeting? Dinner plans are crucial!
- Send him a charming little list of chores I’d like him to tackle, complete with a smiley face and an abundance of hugs and kisses.
- Go out to dinner while cranking the AC on the drive to ensure my hair dries just right. This might mean leaving home at least half an hour early for that perfect curl.
- Spend a good 15 minutes at the restaurant contemplating the menu, only to concoct my own meal by mixing and matching three different options.
- Treat the hostess stand like it’s a treasure trove, stuffing my bag with free toothpicks, matchboxes, and mints. Free stuff is the best, right?
- Hit up the movies, but make a pit stop at the Dollar Store first for snacks, avoiding the outrageous prices at the cinema.
- Spend the entire film noisily crunching my crinkly bag of Sour Patch Kids, way more fun than those overpriced boxes from the theater.
- Make a late-night run to Walmart for all the random items I’ve procrastinated on buying for a month—everything from nail files to a new fan. I’ll compare prices on every single item and present coupons at checkout, using up those coins that have been cluttering my bag.
- Slather my feet in Vaseline, wrap them in plastic, and then cozy up in wool socks for the night. Do they really feel as soft as a baby’s bottom? Who knows, but it’s worth a shot!
- Toss and turn all night, hogging the blankets and every last pillow.
Sounds like a perfect day to me! If you want to read more about fun parenting moments, check out this post on Modern Family Blog. And for those considering home insemination, Cryobaby offers a trustworthy option for at-home insemination kits. Also, don’t miss the insightful discussions on fertility and pregnancy at Cleveland Clinic’s podcast.
In summary, on my birthday, I’ll relish in all the quirky little things that I usually hold back on—because why not?
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