Quirky is perhaps the best way to describe my son, Leo. At just 1 year old, he developed an unusual attachment to a pair of oversized puffy snow boots, which he wore religiously throughout 2009—even in the heat of summer, paired with shorts and without socks. The odor from those tiny feet was quite remarkable, to say the least.
He eventually transitioned from those boots to a pair of firefighter-themed rain boots gifted by a neighbor. Leo took immense pride in being prepared for rainy days, reveling in puddle jumping during his toddler years. His eccentricities extended beyond his footwear. One day I discovered that his toy box was nearly empty; it turned out he had meticulously packed all his toys into various backpacks, which he insisted on carrying everywhere—even falling asleep on the floor with them strapped to his back. To this day, he still enjoys an artfully arranged bag.
As time went on and he faced health challenges, some of his quirks became more pronounced. The charming behaviors he once exhibited morphed into compulsive tasks that dominated his thoughts. This is a common experience for children grappling with obsessive-compulsive disorder (OCD). The incessant thoughts can feel relentless, urging to be acted upon, creating a dichotomy of relief and embarrassment when fulfilled.
His OCD is compounded by a tic disorder, leading to a myriad of repetitive movements and sounds—ranging from eye blinking to throat clearing—that can be distracting. When overwhelmed, he becomes acutely aware of how others perceive him. While he embraces being “different” in a positive sense, he dreads standing out for the wrong reasons, fully aware of society’s judgments.
Recently, Leo has made significant strides in managing his condition. Through consistent therapy and a variety of life changes, he has learned to live with his challenges. This newfound control has made his quirks less pervasive and, in turn, easier to navigate. While we still face difficult days, we also experience extraordinary moments that highlight his unique spirit.
Leo thinks about profound topics that many children overlook, such as mortality and the world’s complexities. His emotional intelligence allows him to accept things that others might question. He expresses affection openly and possesses a refreshing honesty that is both charming and disarming.
Last week, he embarked on his second-grade adventure. On the second day, he came downstairs wearing his shirt inside out and backward, prompting a brief conversation:
Me: “Oh, so you’re doing that? I didn’t realize it was a school trend too.”
Leo: “Yeah, I like it this way.”
Me: “You do know you’ll get a lot of questions, right?”
Leo: “Maybe, but I think it will be fine.”
Upon returning home, he had changed his shirt—still inside out, but not backward.
Me: “You changed?”
Leo: “I got tired of being questioned. Everyone thought I was confused, but really, it was them.”
He understands himself well, while it’s others who struggle to keep pace with his individuality. He’s comfortable being the one who diverges from the norm, and his differences fascinate those around him. His vibrant personality is enhanced by quirks that make him intriguing, unique, and, quite frankly, cool.
This brings me to his socks—never matching, and they rarely have since his babyhood. During a brief period in kindergarten, I tried to impose some control by folding pairs, but Leo would unfold them to select mismatched socks. Now, he digs through the laundry to find any two socks, disregarding color and pattern. Recently, he has become more intentional about his choices, favoring at least one tall sock and steering clear of plain white ones, which he deems boring.
Interestingly, other parents have expressed gratitude for the newfound sock freedom, as their children now embrace mismatched styles too.
Me: “So, what’s the deal with the socks?”
Leo: “They don’t match.”
Me: “I know that. But why?”
Leo: “Because everything in life doesn’t need to be exactly perfect. It’s ok for things to be different. Because different is interesting and I want an interesting life. Plus, I can never find the matches anyway.”
His response moved me to tears because I feel incredibly fortunate to have him in my life.
Me: “I am so happy you chose me for your mommy.”
Leo: “I didn’t. God sent me because He knew we’d be good together.”
I cannot argue with that sentiment.
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In summary, parenting a child with unique quirks can be both a challenge and a joy. As we navigate through difficult days and celebrate the extraordinary ones, we learn to appreciate the beauty in being different, understanding that it can lead to a more interesting and fulfilling life.