Today marks our ninth wedding anniversary. In a city like Los Angeles, where relationships often seem as transient as the latest fashion trends, this milestone is quite significant. Such endurance deserves a grand celebration—yet, we find ourselves with no plans.
Let’s examine the stark contrasts between how couples celebrate their anniversaries before and after having children.
Before Kids:
In the weeks leading up to your anniversary, discussions abound regarding how best to commemorate your union.
After Kids:
You lose track of the calendar, and neither of you realizes that your anniversary is just around the corner. It isn’t until one of you checks iCal for a pediatric appointment that you discover tomorrow is your anniversary.
Before Kids:
You eagerly flip through your wedding album, reminiscing about the joy and laughter of your special day.
After Kids:
Your wedding album has likely vanished amidst the chaos of family life; it may have been inadvertently donated during a recent decluttering effort. Even if you could locate it, any attempt to view it together would be interrupted within moments by a child spilling juice on a cherished photo.
Before Kids:
You meticulously plan a romantic evening, often involving cocktails, fine dining, and a reservation at the trendiest restaurant in town.
After Kids:
With just 24 hours’ notice, you scramble to secure a babysitter. After several attempts, you find someone available—only until 9 p.m. You’ve long lost track of the best dining spots, opting instead for any establishment that serves wine and has an open table.
Before Kids:
You take time to prepare for the evening, indulging in a new outfit, a manicure, and a well-timed waxing appointment.
After Kids:
If you’re fortunate, your children might nap simultaneously, granting you a brief opportunity to shower. Your last pedicure was months ago, and unless you’ve recently received a new dress in your latest Stitch Fix, you’ll likely settle for whatever is clean and somewhat flattering.
Before Kids:
You enjoy a leisurely meal paired with wine, leaving feeling intimate and connected, perhaps even contemplating the joys of parenthood.
After Kids:
You rush through a meal, aiming to return home before the babysitter needs to leave. After a couple of glasses of wine, you might find yourself more intoxicated than intended. The evening concludes with a hurried attempt at intimacy, followed by a debate over who will rise with the children in the morning.
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Summary:
Celebrating a wedding anniversary transforms significantly after becoming parents. While the pre-kids celebrations are often filled with romance and meticulous planning, the post-kids experience tends to be more chaotic and unstructured. Understanding these changes can foster appreciation for the journey of parenthood and the enduring bond of marriage.