I noticed the screen lighting up, felt the vibration in my pocket, and heard the familiar ringtone, yet I chose to decline. Before you take offense at my apparent disregard for your call, allow me to present ten valid reasons why I didn’t pick up.
- I was mediating a heated dispute over a missing dinosaur head. Things were escalating quickly, and I was protecting you from the impending chaos.
- I was frantically tidying up my kitchen, tossing toys off the counters and dishes into the sink. I was trying to maintain my composure, especially with a neighbor unexpectedly dropping by.
- I was in Target (just for paper towels, I promise). Cell phones have an uncanny ability to fail in that store, much like self-control and impulse management when it comes to shopping.
- I had an unfortunate incident involving a diaper.
- The cacophony of my children crying simultaneously rendered me unable to hear the phone. I joined the chorus of tears, creating quite the scene.
- One of my children had gone missing. Fortunately, he reappeared from the shed. No further questions, please.
- I was stuck in carpool line. Engaging in phone conversations there is generally frowned upon by fellow parents.
- My kids were playing harmoniously like little angels, and I knew that answering the phone would disrupt the fragile peace.
- It had been ages since we chatted on the phone. If I answered, you would see the stark contrast between my social media portrayal and the reality of my life—a façade I strive to maintain, albeit unsuccessfully. Conversations never last long before my kids detect my chipper voice and unleash their inner chaos.
- It was blissfully quiet; all my kids were asleep. While this might seem like the perfect opportunity to talk, I was simply too exhausted to engage.
I know this sounds inconsiderate, but every time my phone rings, I find myself thinking, “Please don’t call me; I’ll reach out to you.” Except for you, Sarah; feel free to call anytime, but be prepared for the possibility that I might hang up because, after all, I am a busy parent, too.
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In summary, while the phone may ring and buzz, the reality of parenting often necessitates a moment of silence over a conversation.