Before I embarked on my journey into marriage, my father shared a pivotal piece of advice that has resonated deeply with me: “Dedicate at least 20 minutes each day to focus solely on each other. Regardless of how hectic life may get, it is crucial to carve out that intentional time for one another.”
Initially, I paused to reflect, but the wisdom behind his words quickly became clear. I had already experienced how busy weeks could create a sense of disconnect, despite sharing the same physical space. There were nights when we would collapse into bed after a long day, only to realize that we hadn’t truly seen or acknowledged each other for hours. Those moments, when we finally turned off our devices and shed our daily stresses, allowed us to reconnect. I recognized that too many of those disconnected days left me feeling somewhat incomplete.
Conversely, I also understood the joy of our relationship during vacations, where being together was the main focus. Simple moments spent together, such as waiting in an airport or taking a long drive, felt meaningful. The comfort of sitting on the couch, free from distractions, embracing each other, and simply breathing together was irreplaceable.
I instantly recognized the truth in my father’s advice, yet I couldn’t help but ask questions, as any curious child would.
“Does having dinner together count?” I inquired.
“Not really. You need to focus on one another,” he replied.
“What if we can’t manage 20 minutes? Sometimes it feels impossible.”
“Then aim for 15, 10, or even 5 minutes,” he suggested.
“Really? That still counts?”
“Not as effectively, but it’s certainly better than nothing.”
I appreciated my dad’s perspective and understood the potential this approach could have. As many friends around me are now entering marriage, I’ve been sharing this insight. Each time, they pause to consider, yet instinctively grasp its significance. Many have gone on to pass the idea along, prompting me to document it for wider sharing. Perhaps this straightforward concept can enhance a marriage or two—or at the very least, inspire couples to reconnect for 20 minutes, truly see each other, and say “hello.”
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Conclusion
In summary, dedicating intentional time to connect with your partner daily can greatly enhance your relationship. It fosters connection, understanding, and emotional intimacy, which are crucial for a successful marriage.