Recently, my young daughter, Lily, accidentally spilled some water on the floor. My husband, half-jokingly, instructed her, “Lily, please go to the kitchen, grab a towel, wipe up the water, and then return the towel to the counter.” Surprisingly, without a hint of hesitation, Lily followed his four-step command, meticulously cleaning up the mess and placing the towel back where it belonged.
My husband observed Lily’s seamless execution of his instructions with astonishment. At the time, Lily was just 13 months old and the younger sibling to her brother, Max. When Max was the same age, he might have attempted to find the towel, but he would have likely gotten distracted by a toy or lost track of the task altogether, potentially forgetting the original mission to clean up the spill.
In essence, I have witnessed the classic characteristics often attributed to boys and girls.
Before Lily was born, I often bristled at blanket statements regarding behavior based on gender. I would roll my eyes at parents of daughters who remarked on my son, saying, “He’s such a boy,” while I chased after him at the playground, where their daughters played quietly. The rambunctious behavior was always labeled as boyish, while any traits deemed positive or mature were usually associated with girls. I took these comments personally, as if my son’s behavior was something to be ashamed of. “There’s no difference between boys and girls,” I would argue, wishing it were true.
Then came Lily—a real baby, as I humorously noted after having one of each. Reflecting on Max’s early years, I realized he was a bit like a turkey that had been taken out of the oven too soon. Everything seemed effortless for Lily, while Max often resembled a walking whirlwind, leaving chaos in his wake. In contrast, Lily emerged as precise and organized, equipped with remarkable motor skills.
While I recognize that my experience is limited to just two children, I genuinely struggle to understand why women aren’t leading the world. Lily is extraordinary to me, but she is not alone in her potential. Most mothers of young girls will attest that their daughters, like Lily, could easily become future leaders. Yet, as they grow, confident toddler girls often transform into shy children, then giggling schoolgirls. Women often find themselves needing reminders to assert themselves, despite being born with the innate ability to take charge.
I find myself reflecting on Lily’s confidence and whether I exhibited the same traits at her age. She embodies the me before societal pressures told me to tone it down. I ponder my own lifelong battle with confidence and self-acceptance, realizing I was likely just as capable as young Lily.
It is imperative that we stop allowing our daughters to lose their innate strengths. Just as we must avoid derogatory labels for boys, we owe it to our girls to help them maintain their true selves from the very beginning. They enter this world prepared to lead; our role is to step aside and let them flourish.
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Summary:
This article explores the contrasting behaviors of boys and girls through the author’s experiences with her children. It emphasizes the importance of nurturing girls’ confidence and leadership potential from a young age, urging society to support and encourage their natural abilities rather than allowing them to diminish over time.