While I am neither a single parent nor do I have multiple children, I have discovered that even in a two-parent family, there are moments when extra support is invaluable. For example, there was the time my partner and I had tickets to a concert, and our babysitter canceled unexpectedly. Or the morning we had to arrive at the hospital by 5 a.m. for my partner’s surgery, leaving us scrambling to ensure our child made it to school on time. Our elderly parents live far away, and since neither of us has siblings, we often rely on generous friends for assistance.
While friends with children have helped us with carpooling and occasional sleepovers, their own family commitments can complicate things. Fortunately, we have three close friends without children who adore our child and are always willing to lend a hand. For instance, when I needed help getting my child to lacrosse practice, our friend, Mike, ensured she had dinner and drove her to practice. To my surprise, he even texted me to confirm who was bringing her home afterward, stating he would stay and pick her up if there was any uncertainty.
I’ve also noticed that our childless friends tend to engage more with our child than those with kids. When we gather with families, the kids often retreat to play on their own, which is fine for adult time. However, our friends without children genuinely want to interact with our child, whether that involves playing games or simply chatting. This connection is something my child truly enjoys.
I am grateful for the support from my friends, but I am even more thankful that my child has meaningful relationships with other adults beyond just her parents. Here are three reasons why these friendships are essential:
1. An Unbiased Source for Sensitive Topics
It’s natural for children to feel uncomfortable discussing certain subjects with their parents, such as dating and relationships. Having friends who understand our family values allows them to offer guidance and advice that my child may find easier to accept. I recognize that during my own teenage years, I wouldn’t have felt comfortable asking my parents many questions; instead, I turned to an older family member.
2. A Different Perspective
In a small family, it can be easy to feel isolated if one’s views differ from the others. Having another person who understands the family dynamics can provide valuable perspective. This ensures that my child has someone to vent to, reinforcing that her parents do care for her, even when they seem strict or unreasonable.
3. An Additional Source of Love
Many children have siblings, cousins, and extended family to remind them of their worth. My child only has her parents and grandparents, whom she sees infrequently. Knowing that there are three other adults who love and support her is an important affirmation of her significance in this world.
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In summary, having childless friends enriches the lives of not only parents but also their children, providing support, varied perspectives, and additional love.