Recently, I engaged in an enlightening discussion with my colleague, Alex, who inspired me to explore the practice of meditation. His insightful and humorous book, Finding Peace: How I Calmed My Inner Voice and Boosted My Well-Being, is set to be released next month. Knowing Alex’s extensive research on the connections between habits and happiness, I was eager to uncover his insights.
When asked about a simple habit that enhances happiness, I never imagined I would say this, but my answer is… meditation. Previously, I believed meditation was reserved for spiritual gurus and those who embraced a bohemian lifestyle. However, I came across a wealth of scientific evidence highlighting the numerous health benefits of meditation, which range from lowering blood pressure to enhancing the immune system and even rewiring the brain for greater happiness. I was relieved to discover that meditation doesn’t require sitting cross-legged or chanting. (If you’re interested, I’ve compiled some straightforward meditation instructions on our website.)
I began with just five minutes a day and quickly noticed three key benefits:
- Heightened focus,
- Increased tranquility,
- An improved capacity to redirect my thoughts away from past regrets or future anxieties and back to the present moment.
Over the last four years, I’ve gradually increased my practice to 35 minutes daily, leading to a profound transformation in my relationship with my inner dialogue. This inner voice often drives us to emotional eating, distractions during conversations, and regrettable outbursts. The ability to observe our thoughts without impulsive reactions—often termed “mindfulness”—is an invaluable skill.
While I don’t claim that meditation is a cure-all, it has undeniably contributed to my overall happiness, calmness, and compassion. In fact, I even wrote a book aimed at making meditation appealing to those who don’t identify as hippies or monks, titled Finding Peace.
Obstacles to Happiness
Reflecting on my journey with habits, I realize there are two significant obstacles to my happiness:
- Multitasking: Despite knowing that our brains struggle with focusing on multiple tasks, I often find myself juggling emails, social media, phone calls, and work responsibilities all at once.
- Mindless eating: Although I strive to eat healthily, I have a weakness for comfort foods like pasta and cookies. During moments of indulgence, it can be challenging to stop, often leading to feelings of guilt.
Interestingly, meditation is meant to help with these challenges by encouraging full attention to the present moment. Yet, I still face difficulties.
Aside from meditation, another essential habit for my well-being is exercise. If I neglect my workouts, I begin to feel unsettled. Sometimes my partner, Mia, has to encourage me to go for a run when I’m feeling restless.
In my early thirties, I faced a major setback while covering conflicts for a news network. After returning from a challenging assignment, I fell into a cycle of unhealthy habits, including substance abuse. Recognizing the toll it was taking on my mental health, I sought help from a physician, who guided me to prioritize my well-being. The motivation to change came from the desire for self-preservation.
Traveling for work often complicates maintaining my healthy habits, particularly during high-pressure news events. In those times, my inner voice can become critical, and I find myself succumbing to unhealthy eating habits. Despite these challenges, I find immense fulfillment in my work and view it as a tradeoff.
A pivotal moment in my life occurred after high school when I decided to commit to my education more seriously. This sudden change led to a pattern of hard work and ambition, shaping my future endeavors—albeit sometimes at the cost of my mental health. Meditation has since helped me find balance and navigate the pressures of my career without compromising my well-being.
My partner, Mia, and I significantly influence each other’s habits. When one of us embraces a healthier lifestyle, the other typically follows suit. A valuable lesson I learned from her is the importance of kindness—an essential habit that enhances both our lives. Through compassion meditation, I have learned to prioritize empathy and positive interactions, which not only feels good but also promotes my overall happiness.
The Power of Meditation
Meditation is a powerful tool for personal growth. It’s an exercise for the mind, allowing us to reshape our personalities and foster kindness. Instead of being stuck in our ways, we can adapt and improve ourselves continually. This reminds me of a saying from a record store I frequented: “All dates can change. So can you.”
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In summary, my journey with meditation and habit formation has transformed my inner dialogue, leading to increased happiness and self-awareness. By fostering mindfulness and compassion, I have cultivated a more fulfilling life and built healthier relationships.