Several weeks ago, I indulged in a bath—a true bath, complete with bubbles. This rare treat happens about once every seven or eight months. Although it rarely offers the relaxation I seek, I persist in trying it from time to time. Years ago, I stopped locking the door because, quite frankly, I would prefer unexpected visitors to the noise of my children yelling at each other from the other side.
“Mom, are you almost finished? What are you doing? I was here first! Stop hitting me! Mom, he just hit me! Mom, I need to use the toilet RIGHT NOW!”
We have four bathrooms in our home. Four. Yet, leaving the door unlocked seems like the better option, despite the heavy sigh that follows.
My blissful six minutes of solitude were quickly interrupted by my first uninvited guest, who entered, put the toilet lid down, and made herself more comfortable than I had ever been in a bathtub.
“Why are you taking a bath, Mom? You never do that.”
Before I could respond, another child burst in with newfound enthusiasm.
“Mommy! You’re taking a bath! Can I watch?”
“No, and aren’t you supposed to be doing your homework?”
“Oh yeah, I’ll go get it.”
“Okay. Wait. What?”
Moments later, she returned—still uninvited—plopping down beside the tub with a pencil, a worksheet, and a lap desk. Really?
“I need help with my homework, Mommy.”
Uninvited Guest #1 chimed in, “Mom is trying to take a bath! Right, Mom?”
“Yes, indeed I am, thoughtful child,” I replied, as she perched on the toilet, gently pointing out, “Mom, I can see your…” and gesturing toward my chest area. “Maybe you should cover them up with a washcloth or something?”
“Oh, I’m sorry. Am I making you uncomfortable? You see, in many cultures, it is customary to remove one’s clothing before entering a water-filled tub. Generally speaking, of course.”
What can I say? I seize every chance to impart life lessons (i.e. common sense) to my little ones.
Enter Uninvited Guest #3, and now it’s officially a party.
“MOMMY! Why are you taking a bath? Can I come in?”
“No, buddy. Go find your Dad (where is he, anyway?).”
“Okay, Mommy, be right back.”
“Perfect.”
UG#2 asked, “Mommy, do you like taking a bath?”
“Sometimes more than others.”
UG#1 noted, “Mom, the bubbles are disappearing. Are you sure you don’t want a washcloth or something?”
“Nope. I’m fine, but I appreciate your concern. Here’s a thought—how about you get out?”
Re-enter UG#3, racing toward the bathtub with an exuberant grin plastered on his face.
“Stop the car, Cole! Get out of the car!”
“Buddy, YOU ARE NOT COMING…” (sigh) “Hi, buddy.”
“I like taking a bath with you, Mommy.”
“Please hand me the washcloth.”
And there you have it: “me time,” in a nutshell.
For more insights on parenting and self-care, feel free to explore our other articles, like this one on home insemination. It’s also worth checking out Make a Mom’s authority on fertility, and Facts About Fertility for excellent resources on pregnancy and home insemination.
In summary, attempting to carve out personal time as a mother often leads to amusing interruptions and an avalanche of unexpected visitors. While the quest for relaxation may be thwarted, it serves as a reminder of the chaotic yet delightful life of motherhood.