As a new mother, I have found myself telling my son a few fibs. For instance, I might say we’ll have ice cream tomorrow. When the day arrives, if he forgets to ask, I don’t remind him. I know that indulging him would spoil his appetite, so I remain silent. By the time he recalls our promised treat, we’ve already passed the ice cream shop, and he ends up with a wholesome meal instead. This is just one example of a white lie told with his best interests in mind.
I also find myself saying that if he doesn’t fall asleep within ten minutes, I’ll go to bed without him. The reality is, until he sleeps, I won’t either. But the thought of me not being there to comfort him as he drifts off is too much for him. This little threat often convinces him to surrender to sleep, allowing me to tackle my evening tasks. While this approach may seem dishonest, sometimes parenting demands such tactics.
I’ll admit that I’ve told him Santa will bring him gifts this year, and I’ll likely continue this for years to come. I’ll also mention the Easter Bunny come spring and the tooth fairy when his first tooth falls out. These are fibs I can accept. However, one statement I refuse to make is: “You can be anything you want to be.”
While this phrase is often spoken with good intentions, I believe it can set unrealistic expectations. My love for my son is unwavering; I will always be his biggest supporter. Yet, the truth is that not everyone can achieve every goal due to inherent limitations.
For example, not everyone possesses the skills necessary to perform surgery, nor can everyone be an effective teacher. Some may aspire to be fighter pilots, but physical constraints can prevent them from fitting in the cockpit. It’s simply part of life.
What I do want is for my son to explore his capabilities. If he wishes to try out for the school spelling bee, even if he struggles with the word “cat,” I will encourage him. If he wants to join the band or choir, I will support him, even if he lacks musical talent. I’ll sign him up for every sport he wants to try, from football to tennis, and attend practices, regardless of his natural ability.
I am committed to helping him improve in whatever pursuits he chooses, as long as he remains dedicated. If he wants to try out for the baseball team every year, I’ll be there for him. However, it’s important to acknowledge that he might not possess the necessary skills to pitch for the school team, and that’s perfectly fine. I want him to understand that some dreams may be out of reach, but that doesn’t equate to failure; it means he is simply human.
As my son is still very young, I can’t predict his strength, height, or ambitions. I don’t know if he will shy away from attention or thrive in it, if he will prefer sports over academics, or vice versa. What I do know is that I won’t deceive him about the limits of his aspirations. If a goal is beyond his physical or personal capacity, I will be honest with him.
After all, I am his mother, and I cannot tell him that lie.
For more insights on parenting and related topics, you may find this article on intracervicalinsemination.com beneficial. Additionally, if you’re seeking information on enhancing fertility, check out Make a Mom’s fertility booster for men. For a comprehensive understanding of pregnancy and home insemination, visit CDC’s ART resource page.
In summary, while I will encourage my son to explore his interests and try new things, I will also ensure he understands the importance of recognizing his limitations. This balance is crucial for fostering resilience and self-awareness in his journey through life.