Navigating Your Child’s College Move-In Day Without Losing Your Composure

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By: Jessica Hart

Updated: July 30, 2019

Originally Published: March 14, 2011

Successfully managing move-in day for your child at college hinges on thorough preparation and a willingness to adapt. By this point, you should have acquired all necessary supplies (Target offers a fantastic printable checklist, while Bed Bath & Beyond provides tailored online shopping lists for various colleges) and had essential discussions covering topics such as roommates, friendships, campus safety, health, alcohol consumption, and yes, S-E-X.

Having moved two children into college across a distance of 5,000 miles, we’ve learned valuable lessons about what strategies work effectively. We emerged from those significant days with fond memories (and plenty of cheerful photos to cherish). You will too.

Do’s:

1. Encourage your child to reach out to their roommate via email or social media. This is often when they decide who will bring essential items like a fridge or TV. As a parent, you might be tempted to scrutinize their roommate’s online presence, but try to refrain from passing judgment.
2. If possible, arrive a day early to move-in day. This allows you time to pick up any held purchases, make last-minute buys (there are always a few), and familiarize yourself with your child’s new environment—if they’re willing to be seen with you.
3. Ensure you get a good night’s rest beforehand and enjoy a hearty breakfast. Arriving fatigued can negatively impact your mood, which isn’t ideal for this busy day.
4. Print out and familiarize yourself with move-in directions, schedules, and maps ahead of time. Approach this day with military precision, and you’ll navigate it smoothly.
5. Pack healthy snacks and plenty of water; save the wine for later, despite the urge to indulge. (We opted for a case of water for the dorm.)
6. Bring a small tool kit, duct tape, and sticky hooks, as well as cleaning supplies like paper towels and disinfectant wipes to clean the room before unpacking. This may be the only thorough cleaning the room sees all year.
7. Exchange contact information with the roommate and their parents for emergency purposes only—not to spy on your child’s activities.
8. Include small framed family photos for your child’s desk or nightstand, even if they claim they don’t want them. They’ll likely appreciate having a reminder of home.
9. Pack a small First Aid Kit with essentials like pain relievers and a thermometer. Illness is likely to strike, and being away may heighten your concern.
10. Include earplugs, headphones, and a sleep mask so they can enjoy quiet time or watch TV without disturbing each other, helping to extend the initial harmonious phase of their new living arrangement.

Don’ts:

1. Avoid packing for your child without their involvement. They need to know what they have and where it is. If they do call asking for something, don’t be frustrated; these calls will decrease over time.
2. Don’t attempt to bring their entire wardrobe. Closet space is limited, and shipping items can lead to long waits at the post office. Arrive early if you must ship anything.
3. Refrain from taking over the unpacking or decorating process. This is their space, and they’ll likely rearrange it as soon as you leave.
4. Keep the door open while unpacking to encourage neighborly interactions—many of their peers will drop by to chat, which can ease the transition.
5. If conflicts arise during the move, allow your child to handle the situation independently. They’ll be the ones living with their roommate.
6. Bring tissues, but try to maintain composure. This is a significant milestone for your child, signaling years of dedication and hard work.
7. Don’t miss the chance to capture memories with photos and share affectionate moments, preferably away from their new roommate.
8. Attend orientation programs; they may seem tedious, but they provide valuable insights about the school and help your child meet peers.
9. Don’t forget to tuck a little surprise into their suitcase, and consider sending a care package after a month or so with their favorite treats. Items like glitzy beauty products or fun snacks are always appreciated.
10. Resist the urge to hover. A check-in call or text is fine, but avoid being overly involved. They will manage their responsibilities and routines, just as they will by graduation.

In summary, preparing for your child’s college move-in day requires a balance of organization and emotional restraint. By following these practical tips, you can facilitate a smooth transition while allowing your child to embrace their newfound independence. For more insights on navigating these situations, visit our other blog post for further details on privacy policies.