Ever encountered one of those crunchy moms while shopping for groceries? You know the type: meticulously examining organic veggies, chatting with her little one about ocean conservation, and lamenting the dangers of GMOs? (Guilty as charged here, but I know there are less intense crunchy moms out there!) Or maybe you’ve had a cringe-worthy run-in with one that left you with a lasting impression? As a self-identified crunchy mom, I’m here to share seven unvarnished truths about our tribe—truths that we don’t always voice.
1. We Don’t Always Get Along with Other Crunchy Moms.
Believe me, we understand. There’s nothing more frustrating than being interrupted mid-conversation by someone who feels the need to criticize your parenting choices—like questioning why your child isn’t attending a toddler mindfulness seminar or berating you for vaccinating your kids or allowing them to indulge in GMO treats. We roll our eyes and mentally retreat to our happy place. While not all crunchy moms are unbearable, there are certainly a few that make us cringe too.
2. Grocery Shopping Can Be Overwhelming.
If you see us in the grocery store with a frazzled expression and a messy bun, it’s likely because we’re on the brink of an organic meltdown. Most crunchy moms adhere to unique dietary preferences—be it vegetarian, waste-free, vegan, or strictly non-GMO—and navigating the aisles of conventional grocery stores can feel like a nightmare. If you choose to approach us, be prepared for a lengthy breakdown of why we believe Monsanto is the root of all evil.
3. We Generate More Waste Than We’d Like to Admit.
We often chant the recycling mantra: Reduce, Reuse, Recycle. Most days, we excel at the latter two. However, the reality is that kids are, well, kids. Even my eco-conscious child produces just as much waste as any other child. We’re aware of it and it drives us nuts, but it’s not a subject we’re keen to discuss openly.
4. We Have Our Meltdown Moments.
Like any other mom, there are days when the chaos becomes unbearable. On a particularly chaotic Sunday, even the strongest brew of tea or a bundle of sage won’t help us regain our composure. We might even contemplate a temporary head-banging session to restore our peace of mind.
5. Our Kids Are Not Always Zen.
Despite our attempts at achieving tranquility through meditation and crystals, our toddlers are still prone to meltdowns over the smallest inconveniences. While we strive for calmness and clarity, we often forget that a lot of that comes down to their emotional growth and development. Honestly, I’m more focused on raising a well-mannered, potty-trained child than producing a child genius, and I know many crunchy moms share that sentiment.
6. Self-Care Often Takes a Backseat.
We can recite the ideal steps for a self-care routine faster than we can whip up a peanut butter sandwich. The catch? We rarely get the chance to actually implement those steps after we finish making lunch and tidying up the kitchen.
7. Sleep Often Wins Over Yoga.
When faced with the choice between an extra hour of sleep or yoga, many of us will choose the former and may fib about it. Moms need their rest, and given how often we neglect our own needs (see point 5), we sometimes opt for sleep over exercise, even if it means pretending we have it all figured out.
8. We’re Just Like Any Other Mom.
At the end of the day, no amount of meditation can change the fact that motherhood is tough. We understand that regardless of our dietary choices, we’re all in this together, just trying to raise decent humans. Instead of judging each other, let’s lift one another up. Whether you identify as a crunchy mom, a gym enthusiast mom, a workaholic mom, or a blend of all three, you’re doing the hardest job in the world. So, hats off to you!
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In summary, being a crunchy mom comes with its own unique set of challenges and reality checks. Like all moms, we juggle expectations, ideals, and the messy day-to-day of raising children. We may have our quirks, but at the end of the day, we’re all just trying to do our best.