“An elephant for a nickel is only a bargain if you truly need an elephant and you have that nickel.” My partner often shares this old saying with our children and, honestly, with me too. The truth is, we’re financially strapped, and despite our best efforts, saving money feels nearly impossible — that elusive emergency fund seems like a distant dream.
We recognize that we are part of the working-poor demographic, and we pour our souls into earning the little we have. Yet, there are those who mistakenly equate being poor with laziness and financial mismanagement, suggesting that all we need to do is pull ourselves up by our bootstraps and stash away some cash.
In the renowned American novel, To Kill a Mockingbird, Atticus Finch wisely stated, “You never really understand a person until you consider things from his point of view […] until you climb into his skin and walk around in it.” So, let me share my perspective with you. Come, walk in my shoes.
Defining Needs vs. Wants
In our household, we constantly debate what constitutes a need versus a want. Our definitions often differ starkly from those of middle-class or affluent families. For instance, having internet access isn’t a necessity; it’s more of a desire. Coffee shop visits, fitness trackers, trendy leggings, and smartphones? Those are purely wants. If it doesn’t help sustain life, then it doesn’t qualify as a need—simple as that.
My partner and I juggle nearly 100 hours of work each week combined just to secure safe housing, nutritious meals, medicine, clothing, and transportation. Those are our needs. Everything else comes after that.
Redefining Family Moments
When we think of date night, it means snuggling on the couch after the kids are asleep. Holiday gifting? It involves my partner and me asking for essential items, like socks or workwear, and wrapping them up to maintain the illusion for our kids that we can afford a proper Christmas. Birthdays are celebrated with “vintage” backyard parties, where we grill hot dogs and invite friends and family over for a few hours. My wardrobe? It’s a “capsule” wardrobe because honestly, I can’t afford more than three pairs of pants.
The simple fact is, we can’t save what we don’t have. We’re constantly looking for ways to trim expenses. We remind ourselves that we don’t need an elephant, but it’s even tougher when we don’t have that nickel to begin with.
The Irony of Financial Struggles
For years, we have rushed to get appointments to stand in lines outside charity organizations, pouring over our finances with strangers to apply for winter fuel assistance. There have been times when we struggled to find two nickels to rub together, even having to dip into our children’s piggy banks just to buy enough food to last until payday — all while teaching our kids about saving. Talk about irony.
Yes, we feel shame. Who wouldn’t? Being poor is demoralizing in a society that perpetuates the myth that hard work guarantees prosperity. But when we’re juggling multiple jobs, cutting every possible corner, and still barely making ends meet, I find myself questioning the so-called American Dream. It feels out of reach.
Finding Joy in Resourcefulness
We’re poor, and that’s our reality. But in many ways, we’re doing better than countless other families. We have a warm, safe home that feels joyful. While my children may not know the luxuries of vacations or theme parks, we creatively transform everything that comes into our home — from scrap wood to paper bags — into art projects that create cherished memories. Last year, we scavenged wood from a local dump to craft a Pinterest-worthy treehouse for our kids, and it cost us nothing.
We may be broke, but we’re resourceful. Solutions are everywhere, but that elusive money tree remains out of reach. Like the elephant for a nickel, you need to have the nickel before you can save it.
Further Resources
If you want to explore more about navigating finances and parenting, check out this insightful post on intracervicalinsemination.org. And for those considering at-home insemination, Make a Mom offers reliable kits to help you on your journey. For more resources and insights on pregnancy and home insemination, visit IVF Babble.
Conclusion
In summary, the struggle is real for many families trying to make ends meet. Our financial challenges don’t define us; rather, they shape our resourcefulness and resilience in navigating life’s hurdles.