There’s something that’s been weighing heavily on my heart lately. I know that sharing this may stir up some strong feelings, but my goal is not to criticize; it’s to uplift. So, let me be clear: we are enough just as we are!
In recent years, we’ve made significant strides in promoting body positivity. We’ve rallied against body-shaming on social media and encouraged mothers to be present in photos. Movements like #NoMakeupMovement have inspired countless selfies. Yet, my social media feeds are still overflowing with posts from friends involved in direct sales, advertising ways to shed pounds or erase wrinkles. This leaves me questioning, “Am I truly enough?”
I genuinely cherish these friends, and I understand that their intentions are not to make anyone feel inferior. Having spent four years in direct sales myself, I appreciate the opportunity it provided to work from home while raising my daughters. While the additional income was beneficial, I was fortunate to step back when it became too overwhelming to juggle alongside being a full-time mom. For many friends, direct sales serve as a vital source of income, and I commend them for finding a fulfilling career that allows them to set goals and work within a supportive community while raising their children.
I don’t doubt the value of what my friends are promoting, nor do I judge their customers. I respect the pursuit of self-improvement. If you find something that boosts your confidence, go for it! It’s evident that these products and posts can motivate people to take positive steps in their lives.
However, it would be disingenuous to say I’m completely at ease with it all. Many women grapple with the implications of these posts—those battling eating disorders, struggling with self-image, and measuring themselves against unattainable standards. I know this struggle all too well. I worked hard to overcome body image issues in my youth and recognize my worth beyond my physical appearance.
Despite my regular workouts—motivated by the joy and health benefits they bring—I still feel the weight of societal expectations to appear youthful and fit. With three daughters at home, I lack the mental energy to obsess over my appearance. More importantly, I don’t want my girls to see me fixating on superficial aspects. I want them to witness me exercising as a form of self-care and healthy living, not as a quest for a specific “look.”
The same sentiment applies to my face. Aging is a natural process; some handle it more gracefully than others. It can be challenging to gaze in the mirror and notice new lines that weren’t there yesterday. While I acknowledge that there are effective products available to diminish these signs of aging, I simply don’t want to engage in that routine. I refuse to focus on reversing time. Every year I age symbolizes another year I’ve been blessed to live, to nurture my children, and cherish my loved ones.
Recently, I initiated a conversation with my oldest daughter, who has been captivated by princesses. It hit me that I played a role in this fascination by providing her with dolls, movies, and dress-up items. Now, I’m working to counteract this by teaching her about real beauty. I want her to understand that true beauty comes from within, and you can’t transform a wicked character into a beauty simply by dressing her up. Unfortunately, it’s a tough lesson when her role models are often ageless beauties.
The responsibility lies with me as her mother to set a strong example. I want her to recognize that beauty isn’t solely defined by flawless skin or youth. I don’t shy away from using a bit of moisturizer or makeup if it boosts my confidence. However, it helps to remember that my husband fell in love with me on a beach day, makeup-free. When I asked for perfume last Christmas, he opted for sunscreen because it encapsulated our favorite memories together—he adores the unfiltered me. And so do I, which is why I’ll politely decline any offers of wrinkle cream.
To my friends thriving in their businesses, I’m genuinely happy for you. I know that many of these products have empowered women to feel better about themselves, and I celebrate that progress alongside you.
For those grappling with anxiety and self-doubt when confronted with before-and-after images or beauty transformations, I want to extend a hand and remind you that you are enough, just as you are. If you feel comfortable in your own skin, I raise a toast to you—so do I!
If you’re interested in exploring more about personal journeys and empowerment, check out this insightful blog post. And for those considering at-home insemination, Make A Mom offers quality kits that can help you on your journey. Additionally, WebMD provides a comprehensive guide to navigate pregnancy and home insemination options.
In summary, let’s encourage one another to embrace our authentic selves without the pressures of external standards. Remember, we are all enough just as we are.