We often tell our children, “You can be anything you want to be,” instilling hope and ambition in their hearts. But maybe a more crucial lesson we should impart is this: “Life throws curveballs.”
That’s exactly what happened to me. I never envisioned myself as a mother; it wasn’t a childhood dream of mine. The thought of raising kids and taking responsibility for another life didn’t excite me at all. Then life took an unexpected turn.
Surprise! I found myself pregnant while on birth control. My world flipped upside down. Just as my husband and I were navigating our next birth control options after my daughter was born, I got pregnant again—this time with my son. They’re just 355 days apart.
But amidst all of this chaos, something remarkable occurred. Once I embraced my role as a mom, I had an epiphany: I was actually a pretty fantastic parent. It wasn’t about instinct or being naturally maternal; it was about my daily commitment to being the best mom I could be. Sure, there are days when I feel like I’m barely keeping it together, and I make mistakes aplenty, but that doesn’t define my worth as a mother. If you’re putting in the effort and showering your kids with love, you’re doing great!
Let’s be honest: there are plenty of bad moms out there. We see them on the news or hear about them in passing. Being a good mom is a conscious choice, and I could have easily opted for a more negligent approach, given that motherhood wasn’t in my plans. I could have shrugged and said, “Well, life dealt me a rough hand, so I’ll just coast through parenting.”
Some of us deal with failed contraception, fractured childhoods, or toxic relationships. Many have every justification to reject motherhood, yet we choose a different path. We can seek support and resources—like therapy, parenting classes, or mentors—to help us strive for the best for our kids. Just because life throws us challenges doesn’t mean we will fail as parents.
My daughter and son were entrusted to me, and I made the conscious decision to rise to the occasion, even though it wasn’t my initial plan. I taught them to walk and talk, held them during their illnesses, and celebrated their falls. I give them countless hugs and strive to keep my cool, even when I feel overwhelmed. I dedicate time to their education, ensuring they have a safe home and decent meals, even if half of it ends up on the floor.
I engage with them, listen to their stories, and support their imaginative play. I teach them kindness and respect for others. I’m nurturing two amazing little humans, despite never wanting this role in the first place. I figured things out, sought help, and worked tirelessly. Gradually, I realized I was succeeding. I was being a mom—a good one. And I’ve come to genuinely appreciate this journey.
Yes, life throws us unexpected challenges, but we have the power to choose how we react. We can either complain and perform poorly or, as much as I hate to say it, we can bloom where we’re planted. We can seize our circumstances and infuse them with joy and determination.
I want my kids to know they can achieve anything they aspire to be. I want them to understand that the sky’s the limit, and the only barrier to their dreams is themselves. However, I also want them to recognize that life doesn’t always align with our expectations. During those unpredictable moments, we must decide whether to give up or roll up our sleeves and make the best of our situation. It’s in these “life happens” moments that we discover our strength and our potential as mothers.
For more insights on navigating motherhood and unexpected journeys, check out this post on Cervical Insemination. If you’re considering home insemination, Make a Mom offers reliable at-home insemination kits. And if you’re looking for guidance on pregnancy and fertility, the Women’s Health site is an excellent resource.
In summary, even if motherhood wasn’t part of the plan, we can still embrace it with love, effort, and resilience. Life may throw us curveballs, but how we choose to respond can make all the difference.