My Son Wasn’t Accepted into the Gifted Program, and I’m Totally Fine with It

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When my wife delivered the news to our son, Alex, he tried to mask his disappointment. “You didn’t make it into the gifted program at school,” she said gently. While he shrugged it off, I could see that the weight of rejection hung heavy on him.

Surprisingly, I felt a sense of relief. Sure, as a parent, it’s natural to feel a twinge of indignation when your straight-A student is deemed “not good enough” for a program reserved for the school’s top achievers. I had fleeting thoughts of frustration, especially after learning that the evaluation process took over a year. However, that bitterness quickly faded as I reflected on the implications of such programs.

The Flaws of Standardized Testing

The final nail in the coffin for Alex’s application was his composite score from a variety of intelligence tests—it simply didn’t meet the required threshold. This predicament highlights the excessive testing culture that permeates elementary education, where children are categorized based on arbitrary metrics.

In our district, the gifted program demands several assessments, including the Kaufman Brief Intelligence Test or the Naglieri Nonverbal Ability Test, among others. The bottom line is simple: I’m thoroughly exhausted by testing that serves to divide children. No matter how many degrees the creators of these assessments hold, I refuse to accept that any test can genuinely measure a child’s potential.

The Influence of Pushy Parents

The dynamics of the gifted program often favor those with actively involved parents. I’ve discovered that many students who gain admission are pushed into testing by their families. Alex’s teacher suggested he take the assessments, but that’s not the norm. Most children rely on perceptive educators or, more commonly, the relentless advocacy of their parents to even get considered for the program.

Moreover, if a child doesn’t pass the initial tests, there’s often an appeals process available, which can involve hiring a third-party to reassess the child. This setup disproportionately disadvantages kids without strong parental support or the financial means to pursue these alternatives. Unfortunately, those without advocates are often left with limited options if they don’t excel in the school’s testing process.

Why Gifted Programs Exclude So Many

The enrichment opportunities provided by the gifted program at Alex’s school are undeniably fantastic. The students engage in charity work and embark on educational field trips that most kids would love. These activities embody values I cherish: community service, experiential learning, and building friendships.

But here’s my question: Why reserve these enriching experiences for just a select few? Shouldn’t we promote civic responsibility and meaningful experiences for all children? Gifted programs risk missing an incredible opportunity to share these values with the entire student body, fostering a more inclusive environment where all children can learn and grow together.

Reflecting on the gifted program, I often recall a day not long ago when I dropped my kids off at school and noticed a trio of shiny charter buses idling nearby. “What are those for?” I asked, a hint of annoyance creeping into my voice. “Oh, the gifted kids are heading to Epcot today,” Alex replied, accompanied by a crooked grin.

“Good for them,” I said, trying to keep my frustration in check. I paused, gathered my thoughts, and reminded my kids, “Work hard, and you’ll have your day too.” When Alex felt down about his rejection, I echoed that same encouragement. If he takes that advice to heart, I believe he will ultimately triumph.

In conclusion, my son’s rejection from the gifted program doesn’t define his worth or potential. It’s a reminder that every child has unique talents and abilities that can flourish outside of traditional metrics. For a more in-depth exploration of parenting and family life, check out some of our other posts, like this one on understanding the ins and outs of home insemination or for those considering at-home options, this syringe kit is a reputable choice. Additionally, for excellent resources on pregnancy and home insemination, visit Johns Hopkins Fertility Center.

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