Dear Young Shopper Behind Me,
I see you glancing at my cart. You’re probably overhearing my conversation with the mom in front of me about our kids, school fees, our educational pursuits, and our culinary adventures. You’ve likely noticed the absence of a wedding ring on my finger and the smartphone in my hand. As I pull out that card with “BENEFIT” prominently displayed, I can sense your thoughts racing:
- How can this single mom, looking so put together, possibly be on the Supplemental Nutrition Assistance Program?
- How does she manage a smartphone and still need SNAP?
- How can she hold a master’s degree and still be in this position?
- How does she afford Catholic school for her child?
- How can she allow him to join extracurricular activities while using SNAP?
- How can she discuss gourmet meals and still rely on assistance?
I understand your confusion because I used to think the same way when I was your age.
You fumble with the card, and I can feel your hesitation. You approach a manager and quietly say, “She has SNAP,” as if it’s something shameful—something to be hidden rather than a lifeline that nourishes my son and me.
Let me share a bit about my life: Yes, I’m a single mother, but my journey here wasn’t by choice. I made a decision to leave a marriage that wasn’t right for me, seeking a better life for both my son and myself. I take pride in my appearance and work hard to maintain it, often shopping second-hand and trying to save wherever I can.
My master’s degree wasn’t handed to me; I earned it through hard work. It doesn’t guarantee a high salary, but I’m dedicated to my full-time job, often working late into the night to provide for my family. That smartphone isn’t just for social media; it’s a crucial tool for my work and for continuing my education whenever I can find a moment.
My son gets to attend a Catholic school because I make sacrifices—sacrificing my own luxuries like gym memberships and personal grooming so he can have the best education possible. I trade my marketing services to ensure he can participate in activities that foster growth and community.
The meals we enjoy come from careful planning and creativity. I love trying new recipes and making the most of what we have, ensuring we eat healthily while having fun in the kitchen.
As for holding my head high? I do it because I know I’m doing my best for my son. I believe my situation is temporary. I’m grateful to be in a country that offers assistance like this, and I’m proud to be honest about my circumstances. Having SNAP doesn’t define me or my future. Just because my marriage didn’t work out doesn’t mean I’m a failure.
And to the mom behind me, thank you for your quiet understanding. It’s individuals like you who show compassion in the face of misunderstanding.
So, to you, the young shopper, I hope you can learn not to judge too quickly. I wish for you to approach each person with an open mind. We all have our struggles, and we’re doing what we can to overcome them.
Together, we will rise, and I know my future is bright.
Sincerely,
A Dedicated Single Mom
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