I vividly recall the days leading up to the birth of my twins, scrolling through Facebook and stumbling upon an article that criticized the unrealistic pressures on women to shed baby weight at lightning speed—thanks to some celebrity moms who seemingly left the hospital looking like they’d never even been pregnant. Seriously? As I munched on handfuls of buttery popcorn, I couldn’t help but think: why should we feel compelled to snap back into our pre-baby bodies immediately? We’re busy creating life, nourishing those little ones, and dealing with sleep deprivation, not to mention the occasional surprise poop or spit-up incident. It’s utterly absurd to think we should fit into our old clothes right away. Instead, we should be celebrated for our strength and resilience during this transformative time.
Deep down, I thought I’d bounce back effortlessly—after all, everyone said I would. I envisioned myself growing these tiny humans and then simply slipping back into my old self like it was no big deal. Fast forward to now: my boys are seven months old, and I find myself curled up in a corner of my room, cradling my legs and whispering, “It’s going to be okay! You are strong. You are beautiful. You will get through this.” Meanwhile, I gaze at a pair of pants—four sizes larger than anything I’ve ever owned—lying crumpled on the floor. Spoiler alert: they didn’t fit, and they were soon launched across the room in frustration.
In a fit of optimism, I purchased a pair of real jeans, convinced that after a week of dieting and exercising, I would be ready to ditch the maternity wear. I was sorely mistaken. Here I am, trying to piece myself back together, belting out Lady Antebellum’s “Need You Now” to my old jeans, which I’m pretty sure wouldn’t even make it past my knees. It’s hard not to reminisce about the days of less jiggling and fewer dimples—when I could wear something other than leggings that I could hoist up to my bra to smooth everything out. #StillFeelingCuteButNotReally
On top of all the other fairy tales I was told—like “Kids are the greatest joy you’ll ever experience”—I was also led to believe that breastfeeding would magically melt away the extra weight. After seven months of nursing, you’d expect me to be slipping into non-maternity jeans like a pro, right? Nope. According to a quick Google search, breastfeeding burns between 200 to 300 calories (or more) per feeding, which is likely even higher since I’m nursing twins. Want to know the catch? When your body uses that much energy, it craves food. And guess how much time I have to whip up healthy meals? None. Honestly, if I had the time, I’d still choose carbs over egg whites any day.
I understand that my body has gone through something profound and, let’s be honest, quite traumatic. It’s going to take time to heal and adjust. Yet, some days, I wish I could feel like my old self, even for just a moment. My hair is still falling out, my nails are brittle, and I lack the energy to put on makeup or even shave my legs. I’m tethered to a breast pump or a child most of the time, trying to navigate this new reality. While I’ve adapted to the sleepless nights, adjusting to a larger body—one that still aches from surgery seven months ago—is not something I’m eager to tackle.
And why did I even think about trying on jeans, you ask? An article about a mom who ran a marathon while pushing her triplets caught my eye. Seriously? People actually do that? If she can manage a marathon with three kids in tow, surely I can fit into some real pants. But alas, I can’t. The truth is, I’m just exhausted. But, let’s be real—that exhaustion might also be because of my current food coma, courtesy of Ben & Jerry’s The Tonight Dough and cheeseburgers.
Whatever. Real pants are overrated anyway.
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In summary, the journey of motherhood brings with it a multitude of challenges, especially when it comes to body image and the pressure to conform to societal standards. It’s crucial to embrace the changes and celebrate the strength of our bodies during this transformative time. After all, leggings will always be there for us, offering comfort while we navigate this wild adventure of parenthood.
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