My partner and I have ambitious plans to purchase our first home within the next couple of years. We hope to settle down before our kids start elementary school, allowing them to grow up alongside the same friends year after year. While it’s common for children to change schools, the thought of uprooting them from the friendships they’ve built over time simply because we had to move to a different district tears me apart.
We have a solid strategy in place — a plan we believe in. We’re determined to find a house in two years.
However, the housing market in our area (Portland, Oregon) is out of hand, and it’s infuriating. Modest homes are selling for sky-high prices, often well above asking — in cash. Who are these people with piles of cash just lying around? I’d love to know what field they’re in because, clearly, I’ve chosen the wrong career path.
While it may not be as extreme as cities like San Francisco or New York, our market is rapidly catching up. Even though my partner and I are both college-educated, hardworking individuals with a solid savings plan for a down payment, I often find myself staring at listings in disbelief, wondering, How on earth are we going to afford this?
The truth is, I have no idea.
When I share our struggles with friends and family, the suggestion that comes up most often is, “Why don’t you just move somewhere cheaper?”
If only it were that simple.
First off, we have family here. My relatives live in California, so visits are infrequent, but my partner’s family is nearby. My kids adore their grandparents, and having trusted family to help watch them is invaluable. I want my children to grow up surrounded by their aunts, uncles, and cousins. Family should be friends, too; they should vacation together and learn from one another. I hate being far away from my loved ones, and I want better for my kids.
Secondly, my life is here. I moved to Portland over a decade ago, and it’s become my home. It’s not just the city I chose for college; it’s where I discovered myself — where I fell in love, got married, and welcomed two beautiful children. The art, culture, nature, and yes, even the food trucks are part of what makes this place special to us. Don’t make me leave my beloved food trucks!
Most importantly, I simply don’t want to move. Moving means packing and unpacking, leaving behind old friends, and searching for new ones. It means finding the best local Thai restaurants and playgrounds all over again, and I refuse to let the housing market dictate my life. I already know where the best pad thai is, and I am not going anywhere, Portland. Do you hear me?
Given this mindset, I find myself back to scrolling through MLS listings, often while indulging in a pint of Ben & Jerry’s. All I want is to plant roots in a city I cherish, surrounded by loved ones, and give my kids a place to grow up, create memories, and eventually return to during college breaks. Yet, with rising housing prices, that dream feels increasingly out of reach. Still, we are holding on.
I don’t have all the answers. I don’t know how we’ll make it work or how we’ll afford a home. But I do know we’re not just going to “move.” It’s far more complicated than that. We will keep saving, hoping for a miracle, and perhaps some kind-hearted benefactor will gift us a home. If I’m going to dream about affording a house here, I might as well dream big.
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In summary, while the housing market is challenging and pushing many of us to consider alternatives, the desire to stay rooted in a beloved community remains strong. We may not have all the answers, but we are committed to making our dreams a reality.
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