When the nurse placed my newborn daughter in my arms, I was engulfed by confusion and disbelief. In a haze of pain medication, I thought, “Surely, she doesn’t think I can care for this little human.” As she briskly exited my recovery room, I stared at my daughter, overwhelmed and clueless about what to do next.
Prior to her arrival, I did my best to prepare for motherhood, yet nothing could have prepared me for the reality I faced. I felt completely blindsided by the demands of a newborn, especially during those early days marked by physical recovery from a C-section and the emotional toll of postpartum depression. My body felt alien, my mood swings were intense, and my baby seemed to reinvent the rules each day. Growth spurts, diaper changes, and sleepless nights led me to question my maternal instincts. Honestly, I was exhausted.
Now that my children are teenagers, I often reflect on those early chaotic months and realize how much I would have done differently. While I wouldn’t want to revisit the sleepless nights or the discomfort of nursing, if I could send a message back in time, I’d offer my postpartum self these nuggets of wisdom:
- That baby wipe warmer? Total waste of cash and space. Invest in a quality nursing bra instead.
- Cheap diapers work just as well as the high-end brands. Use the savings for a glass of wine—you’ll thank me later!
- Skipping a shower is perfectly acceptable. If it gives you time for a hot cup of coffee, then do it! Embrace ponytails and dry shampoo.
- Your first post-C-section intimate encounter might make you question your marriage, but it does get better.
- Forget about removing breast milk stains from your clothes. It’s pointless—buy yourself some new outfits because you deserve it.
- Your child won’t be using a pacifier at 18. If they’re still using it at 4, it’s all good.
- Potty training? Don’t stress! They’ll get there when they’re ready.
- Memorize the scent of your baby’s head. It’s a fragrance you’ll long for in the years to come.
- Cherish those quiet moments in the dark with your baby. Life will become a whirlwind before you know it.
- It’s completely fine to tell your toddler that public restrooms don’t exist. Trust me on this one!
- Embrace the magic of being Santa, the Easter Bunny, and the Tooth Fairy. When the truth comes out, it’ll hit hard.
- You will return to normal bathroom habits, but expect an audience for a while.
- Tossing your kids’ artwork? No judgment here. Keep the handprint masterpieces and recycle the rest.
- Those infant cries may drive you nuts now, but soon, you’ll find yourself missing that baby voice.
- Buy a cake for their first birthday. No toddler remembers the late-night icing experiments—sleep is vital!
- Make time for dates with your partner. You’ll need that bond when the kids are grown and you’re left with silence.
- Don’t always be the one behind the camera. Get pictures of you with your kids; they’ll want to remember you too.
- It’s okay to think your toddler is a handful. They can be little terrors sometimes!
- Toddler tantrums require patience (and maybe a glass of wine). You’ll survive!
- You will reconnect with your career. It may feel strange at first, but you’ll find your footing again.
- Be kind to yourself daily. It’s crucial for maintaining your sanity, especially on tough days.
- You can’t return your baby, but it’s alright to wish for a temporary break from that crying bundle at times.
- Hiding in a closet to call your best friend? Totally acceptable! Don’t believe any mom who says otherwise.
- Remember, you created a human. That alone makes you a superhero!
- If you feel something’s off with your child, advocate for them fiercely. A mother’s intuition is powerful.
- The first poop after a C-section will be a life-altering experience. Stock up on stool softeners and witch hazel pads.
- If someone tells you to “sleep when the baby sleeps,” kindly ask them to do your laundry or cook. It’s infuriating when your baby has other plans!
- Avoid looking “down there” for the first few months. Curiosity may lead to horror—just don’t do it!
- Sleep will return to your life eventually. You’ll feel like a ninja, but you will catch some Z’s.
- You will fit into jeans again. They might not be the same size, but you’ll rock a new look!
There are countless moments I’d love to redo or adjust. I’d remind myself to relax and that strict bedtimes only lead to frustration. The days might feel long, but the years fly by. I’d also encourage myself to prioritize downtime over chores and indulge in Netflix during nap time.
Above all, I’d wrap my new mom self in a warm embrace and whisper, “You’re doing great.” That’s truly what I needed to hear back then.
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Summary:
Reflecting on the early days of motherhood, I wish I could share essential insights with my postpartum self. From practical tips on parenting to self-care reminders, these 30 pieces of advice highlight the importance of kindness towards oneself and the understanding that motherhood is a journey filled with challenges and joys.
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