12 Insights Gained from Seven Years of Marriage

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By: Emily Carter

Marriage is a journey that reveals much about who you are and who you can become, and I’ve learned countless lessons through my own experience. My partner, Jake, and I have grown together, adapting through the ups and downs of life. Here are the most significant lessons I’ve garnered along the way:

1. The Early Years are the Toughest.
   You know those initial years? The ones where you merge your lives and discover quirks, like your spouse’s habit of drinking straight from the milk jug? It’s a learning curve that sets the stage for deeper understanding. You’ll find yourself navigating the little annoyances and standing firm on the important issues. Eventually, you’ll reach a point where words become unnecessary, though occasionally, reminders about the milk jug still surface.
2. Toilet Seat Discussions Aren’t Worth It.
   Save those arguments for topics that matter, like who handles the next late-night diaper duty. Prioritize wisely!
3. Invest in a Rug Doctor.
   We purchased ours pre-kids, and it’s been an absolute lifesaver. From cleaning up messes to restoring the carpet’s original color, this handy machine is a marriage saver. Poop on the floor? Rug Doctor. Crayon on the carpet? You guessed it!
4. Makeup Isn’t Mandatory.
   While I appreciate looking my best, when you’re both operating on little sleep, your husband is less concerned about your makeup and more focused on your well-being. Embrace the natural look, especially when survival mode kicks in.
5. Children are Energy Drainers.
   Kids will consume your time, emotions, and even your sanity. They become your constant thought, so you must prioritize your relationship to avoid drifting apart. Remember each other amidst the chaos, or you may find yourselves strangers years down the line.
6. Communication Evolves.
   In a household filled with kids, effective communication often means being louder. However, as you face challenges together, you learn to express yourselves better. Over time, you’ll argue less and understand each other more.
7. Cherish Your Time Together.
   Even if it’s just a quiet moment on the porch with a beer after the kids are asleep, you’ll come to appreciate these fleeting instances. What used to be an abundance of time has become a rare luxury, making those moments feel like a mini-vacation.
8. Laundry Will Overwhelm You.
   Prepare for a never-ending mountain of laundry that will invade your life. You might even dream about it! Seriously, you may contemplate drastic measures, but accepting it as part of the journey is essential.
9. Cooking Skills Are Overrated.
   I’m no chef, and yet, everyone in my house is thriving. Master the basics like peanut butter sandwiches and microwave meals. If you want to impress, a jar of spaghetti sauce with boiled noodles will do the trick.
10. Different Interests Are Healthy.
    Initially, I wanted to do everything with Jake, but as we became parents, I craved alone time. Having separate hobbies fosters individuality and reminds you that you’re more than just a parent.
11. Everyone Needs Downtime.
    I used to think I deserved breaks because Jake was at work all day. It took time to realize he was working hard for our family too. Recognizing each other’s efforts and allowing time for rest is crucial for a happy home.
12. You Will Change Together.
    You are not the same people you were when you said “I do,” and that’s a positive development. Over the years, you’ll adopt elements of each other’s perspectives and grow together, which is vital in teaching your children about collaboration and personal growth.

One of the best pieces of marriage advice I received was, “Some days you’ll look at your partner and wonder why you chose them.” It’s true; you will question everything. Yet, if you’re both committed, your friendship will deepen, and your partnership will thrive. Some days, you’ll give more; other days, you’ll take more. Together, you’ll tackle challenges, leading to moments of realization that you truly have each other’s backs.

And while you may never fully eliminate the milk jug habit, with teamwork, you might just negotiate a majority of those late-night diaper changes.

If you’re interested in more insights, check out one of our other blog posts to further engage with topics on relationships. Additionally, for those exploring at-home insemination options, you can find reputable kits at Make a Mom. For more information on pregnancy and home insemination, visit News Medical.

Summary:

Marriage is a journey filled with growth, communication, and the need for mutual understanding. Through the trials of parenthood and daily life, couples can learn valuable lessons that strengthen their bond. Embrace the changes, cherish your time together, and remember that both partners contribute equally to the relationship’s success.