Motherhood has completely consumed my life; it feels like I’ve been swallowed whole. While that may not be the most pleasant image, it is my reality. I adore my son and daughter with every fiber of my being, yet I can’t help but notice that the passions that once brought me joy have dimmed considerably. This past year of staying home has been a monumental challenge—truly, it’s been tough. Each day blurs into the next, and I find myself eagerly anticipating my husband’s return from work, a longing that’s hard to admit. It’s painful to witness how effortlessly everything seems for other mothers, and I struggle with the comparisons.
During the spring months, when the winds of the High Plains of Colorado are at their fiercest, I found it increasingly difficult to leave the house. When outdoor conditions are unfavorable, our options for indoor activities are limited, leaving me feeling cooped up and restless. One afternoon, after nap time, I needed to run some errands. As I dressed my son, he looked up at me and asked, “Why are we putting on clothes? Where are we going?” Oh, the mom guilt hit hard. It’s clear he’s accustomed to our pajama-clad days unless there’s a reason to venture out.
I attempted to explain that clothes are a necessity regardless of our destination, but he wasn’t convinced. “But where are we goooing?” he pressed. “To the store,” I replied, and his face lit up as if I had promised him a trip to the moon. “Can I get a sucker?” he asked, excitement bubbling over. I smiled, knowing how much joy that simple treat brings him.
His enthusiasm for running errands is contagious. He loves to share his discoveries with the cashier, proudly recounting our purchases. He even demonstrates how my sparkling water can erupt like a volcano, complete with sound effects. The cashier chuckles, charmed by his innocent curiosity. After picking a flavor for his Dum Dums sucker—root beer, of all things—his adventurous spirit shines through. His unfiltered joy is a beautiful reminder of the wonder in everyday life.
Yet, I often feel the need to nurture his curiosity further. The educator in me believes I should be challenging his mind and introducing new experiences. Unfortunately, my own creativity feels depleted. I always envisioned that my creative nature would flourish in motherhood, but the reality has been quite the opposite.
After discussing this with my husband, I realized that to genuinely support my children’s creativity, I must first nurture my own. Just as flight attendants advise parents to secure their own oxygen masks before assisting their children, I need to rekindle my own spark for life to be the best mom I can be. If nothing else, my own happiness is worth pursuing.
So, here’s my new motherhood mission statement: I commit to setting aside time each week to create and learn, or to learn through creation. Whether it’s writing, visual arts, or even interpretive dance, I want to embrace life with the same enthusiasm as a toddler imagining a volcano.
For further insights on nurturing your motherhood journey, check out this engaging piece on intracervicalinsemination.org. Also, if you’re interested in conceiving at home, Make a Mom offers a variety of at-home insemination kits. Lastly, for anyone looking to navigate the complexities of pregnancy, Healthline is an excellent resource.
In summary, embracing my creative journey is not just a personal endeavor; it’s essential for my growth as a mother. By reigniting my passions, I can better foster the curiosity and joy in my children’s lives.
Leave a Reply