Last night was a true test of parenting resilience. With my partner away, our part-time nanny unavailable due to schedule changes, and my in-laws unable to reach us in time, I found myself alone with my three kids. To top it all off, I was hit with the most excruciating migraine I’ve experienced in years. The last time I endured a migraine of this magnitude, our previous full-time nanny had stepped in to help, ensuring the kids were tucked in safely while I struggled to make it through the evening. I woke up to a tidy home, clean dishes, and my children peacefully asleep, all thanks to her kindness. But now, with my beloved nanny relocated to North Dakota (again, not my husband), I was left to fend for myself.
With sharp, stabbing pain radiating from my left eye to the back of my neck, and nausea creeping in, I was grateful I had the foresight to prep dinner in advance. I managed to plate their meals and pour drinks before curling up on the couch in agony, delegating tasks to my newly promoted 5-year-old babysitters. “Is your baby sister done with her food? Can you make sure she’s not standing in her high chair? And please, keep her from sticking a fork up her nose!”
My pride in preparing adorable fruit skewers—filled with peaches, blackberries, grapes, and strawberries—quickly turned to regret as I envisioned my 21-month-old accidentally injuring herself with them. Thankfully, my caring son helped by plucking the fruit off the skewers and placing them on her tray.
As the clock struck five, I felt overwhelmed at the thought of getting my children bathed, teeth brushed, and into pajamas. The boisterous chatter of my 5-year-olds pierced my migraine like daggers. I could sense my youngest staring at me, puzzled by my curled-up state on the couch. “Mama, Mama, Mama,” she kept calling, to which I offered minimal responses.
When my 5-year-olds informed me that their little sister had finished eating, I took a deep breath, mustered my energy, and cleaned her up. To my dismay, I discovered she had stuck a corn kernel up her nose. I had no energy to react but knew I had to take action. After removing the first kernel, I found another lodged deeper. What a testament to my years of parenting that I could now add “foreign object removal from toddler noses” to my resume!
By 6 PM, I was ready to throw in the towel. My toddler usually goes to bed at 7, but I decided a 6:15 bedtime would suffice since I was running on fumes. I managed to get her in pajamas and change her diaper before calling my 5-year-olds upstairs. I declared a bath and tooth-brushing holiday, and they joined me in bed to watch cartoons while I rested under the covers. At one point, I had to make a quick trip to the bathroom, and I asked them to tuck themselves in. They took it in stride, with my son even turning off the lights and comforting his sister.
Finally, silence fell over the house, and I felt immense gratitude that the day was over. As the pain in my head began to recede, I reflected on how fortunate I was to have such resilient children. I know not everyone is blessed with a supportive network; some parents manage without a village, and I admire their strength. If your kids are fed, have clean teeth most of the time, and occasionally take a bath, you’re doing a fantastic job.
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In summary, parenting without a support system can be overwhelming, especially on the toughest days. It’s vital to recognize the resilience within yourself and your children, and to celebrate the small victories—even when they feel monumental.
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