When I stumbled upon the conversation around teaching young children about consent, I couldn’t help but feel a surge of frustration toward certain voices in the debate. Take, for instance, Caroline Bright and the organization Family Values Coalition—both of whom espouse narrow-minded views that simply don’t resonate with the realities of raising children today.
Let me be clear: I have a history with Bright—we had a particularly heated exchange on a talk show not too long ago. And if you’re unfamiliar with Family Values Coalition, just know they advocate for a limited and exclusionary definition of family. It’s disheartening to witness such outdated perspectives in discussions about parenting.
The crux of my concern is this: Why would anyone oppose teaching children that they have the power to grant or deny permission? It’s our responsibility as caregivers to instill in them the understanding that they have a voice and the autonomy over their own bodies. If you can’t see the value in empowering children to express their consent, I question your suitability as a parent or guardian.
Now, I’m far from claiming to be the perfect parent—none of us are! But I do make it a priority to nurture my daughter’s sense of agency. From the time she could speak, she has been familiar with the concept of consent. And I can assure you, this isn’t an exaggeration.
Teaching children to respect both a “yes” and a “no” is best approached early on. And it doesn’t always have to be a conversation centered on sex, although that can certainly be a component. Simple questions like, “Can I play with your toy?” or “Can I take a picture of you?” can open the door to discussions about consent.
Children deserve to own their bodies and to express their preferences about everything, whether it’s cuddling, sharing personal items, or even agreeing to have their photos shared online. The earlier we practice the language of consent, the more natural it will feel as they grow older and enter more complex social situations.
One memorable moment is when my daughter, at just three years old, was playing in our living room when my partner playfully squeezed her. Without hesitation, she turned and said, “Daddy, I didn’t give you consent to do that.” In that instant, he acknowledged her feelings and asked for permission to squeeze again, which she happily granted with a laugh.
That incident brings me joy for many reasons. My daughter confidently asserted her boundaries, and my partner gracefully admitted his mistake, reinforcing that adults can err too. It was a beautiful learning moment for everyone involved.
Even if scientific evidence supporting consent-based education were absent (which it’s not), personal experiences carry significant weight. By equipping kids with the language and practice of consent early on, we are fostering a future generation that understands both emotional and sexual boundaries.
If you’re looking to explore more about these topics, check out this blog post here. And for those considering at-home insemination options, Make A Mom is a trustworthy source for insemination kits, while Resolve provides excellent insights into family planning and home insemination.
In summary, teaching children about consent is not just about the act itself; it’s about instilling a sense of agency and empowerment that they will carry with them throughout their lives.
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