5 Baby Sleep Tips You Might Want to Keep to Yourself

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As a parent to three little ones all under the age of 8, I’ve experienced my fair share of sleepless nights. Each of my children has their own unique sleeping challenges. My eldest insists on being held through the night, while my youngest seems to think 2 a.m. is prime time for a party. And my middle child? Well, they’ve mastered the art of keeping me on my toes. Throughout the years, I’ve been showered with a plethora of baby sleep advice—most of it from people who either don’t have kids or who assume their solutions are one-size-fits-all. While I’ve responded graciously, I often feel like telling them to take a hike after some sleepless nights. Here are a few gems I’ve received, along with how I’d love to respond if I weren’t so polite:

1. Take her to the doctor; they can prescribe something.
   Oh, really? If you’ve had kids, you’d know that doctors won’t hand out medication until a child is at least two. Until then, all a parent has are two placebo options: Tylenol and ibuprofen, which do little more than give the illusion of control. The doctor will likely just shrug, leaving you to navigate sleepless nights alone, while I drive home, half-asleep and dreaming of a vasectomy.
2. Don’t let her nap during the day; she’ll sleep better at night.
   Seriously? That’s like telling me not to use the restroom for 12 hours. I need those naps just as much as she does! A moment of peace without a clingy, drooling toddler is essential for my sanity. Naps are my saving grace.
3. Just let her cry it out; it sucks, but it’s worth it.
   Been there, done that. It felt more torturous than the sleep deprivation itself. I’d rather endure sleepless nights than listen to my baby cry.
4. Establish a routine; consistency is key.
   Oh, great idea! If only my life allowed for that kind of predictability. With three kids, my evenings are a chaotic mix of homework battles, tears, and last-minute snack requests. I can barely get myself to bed at a consistent time, let alone my kids!
5. Put her down when she’s drowsy but not asleep.
   Brilliant suggestion! I’ll just stop everything I’m doing to monitor my child’s drooping eyelids. Dinner? Homework? Forget it, I need to watch for that sleepy face! Life doesn’t have a pause button, and I can’t hit stop just because my kid is getting drowsy.

Despite all the chaos, there are rare moments when all my kids sleep through the night, and I wake up feeling like a new person—only to be jolted awake by the realization that the only way they could all be sleeping is if something was wrong. So I leap out of bed to check on them, and inevitably, wake at least one in the process.

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In summary, seeking advice on baby sleep can be overwhelming, especially when it comes from those who don’t truly understand the challenges of parenting. Remember, every child is different, and what works for one may not work for another.