By: Jamie Thompson
Updated: Aug. 27, 2020
Originally Published: Jan. 8, 2016
As a mother of three, I can confidently say that my life is filled with beautiful chaos. I have three children—three incredible yet challenging kids who can be exhausting and, at times, utterly draining. This was the vision I had for myself as a child: a vibrant woman in my 30s, effortlessly juggling a successful career while being the quintessential mom, flanked by my three adorable kids on a picturesque beach, soaking in life’s wonders.
So, I have the children, but let’s be real—the rest of that dream is a bit skewed. Convincing my husband to have a third child wasn’t a walk in the park. After having two daughters, I pulled the “Don’t you want to try for a boy?” card. He was content with his daughters, but after much persuasion, he finally relented—and now he wouldn’t trade our toddler son for anything. At the time, I genuinely would have been happy with either gender; I just knew I had to fulfill my desire for a third child.
And just like that, my family felt complete. My maternal aspirations were achieved, and I thought I was done with the baby-making phase. But life isn’t that straightforward, especially when biological clocks and hormones come into play. It’s fascinating how primal instincts kick in when you least expect them.
After my son was born, I faced some complications during pregnancy that left me feeling a bit rattled. However, once I held my little boy, I was overjoyed. He was my world. But on the drive home from the hospital, my husband asked a simple yet piercing question: “So, how was your last pregnancy?” That’s when it hit me—“last.” The tears started to swell in my tired eyes, and I fought to keep them at bay.
How could he be so unaware? To his credit, he was only asking an innocent question. He was satisfied with our family size, while I was grappling with an emotional storm. Despite the turmoil, my body had other plans. After turning 35, my ovaries seemed to develop a mind of their own—one that was rather insistent and demanding.
It was as if my ovaries decided to take on a life of their own, clamoring for one more baby. Have you ever felt that? If so, you’re not alone. If you can relate, keep reading; if not, you might want to click away.
These ovaries are relentless, popping out eggs with a regularity I’ve never seen before. It’s almost cruel, given that this kind of predictability would’ve been appreciated back when I was actually trying to conceive.
Let me illustrate what a typical mid-cycle conversation with my ovaries looks like. Around day 12 of my cycle, I start daydreaming—nothing too scandalous, just a reflection of my heightened libido. My husband is certainly not complaining about my increasing interest in intimacy, but I can’t help but question where this sudden surge of desire is coming from.
Me: “Ovaries, are you trying to trick me? You want me to get pregnant, don’t you?”
Ovaries: “Absolutely! We’ve got a prime egg waiting for you this month. Don’t let this opportunity slip away.”
Me: “I appreciate the enthusiasm, but my husband is not on board with this idea. So even if I have a fleeting desire for another baby, we’re done.”
Ovaries: “Maybe he’ll change his mind. You know you want this egg!”
Me: “It’s not just about me. I have goals to achieve. I need to focus on becoming a better version of myself for my kids.”
And so the banter continues. My ovaries are relentless in their persuasion, throwing out enticing thoughts like, “This egg could have the sleep gene!” or “This baby will be a breeze!” But I know better. I’ve been on the edge of sleep-deprived insanity for eight years, and I’m not about to go back.
I’m determined to lose weight, get in shape, and perhaps even pursue further education. I want to show my kids what it means to strive for greatness—not to be just a shadow of my former self.
Ovaries: “Just think about how happy you were when your other kids were born. This is your last chance!”
Me: “I hear you, but it’s not happening. He’s getting a vasectomy. There will be no sperm involved.”
So, here I am, grappling with the chaos of mid-30s hormones. If you’ve found a way to quiet those persistent urges and control your biological clock, I’d love to hear your tips. For now, I’m heading to the gym to focus on self-improvement.
If you’re in a similar boat and want to explore options related to family planning, check out this informative post here or consider purchasing an at-home insemination kit from a reputable retailer. Also, for further insights into pregnancy and home insemination, this resource is incredibly useful.
In summary, while I’ve achieved the family I always wanted, my body seems to have other plans. The tug-of-war between my aspirations and my biological instincts continues, and I’m determined to find balance in this chaotic journey of motherhood.
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