When you step into the world of parenthood for the first time, everyone seems eager to share their wisdom. “Make sure she wears a hat!” “Feed her every two hours, no exceptions!” “Keep her indoors! She might catch a cold!” “Adjust her head; she doesn’t look comfortable.” “Where’s that hat? She must wear a hat!” The barrage of advice can feel daunting, draining, and is, at times, only marginally useful.
By the time my second daughter arrived, I thought I was well-prepared. I had responses ready for every piece of advice that might come my way. “Bring it on!” I thought confidently as I took my little one out into the world. To my surprise, the usual suggestions didn’t arrive. Instead, I was met with smiles, admiration, and compliments. No one critiqued how I held her, whether I fed her enough, or the outfit she was wearing. In that moment, I was simply allowed to be a parent.
Having a second child transitions you from the role of advice recipient to that of an advice giver. Now, after a year of this new title, I find myself navigating how to offer advice without triggering the same emotions that past advice givers evoked in me. I can share what worked for me, what didn’t, and the joyful as well as challenging moments I experienced. It’s all about striking the right balance.
As I held my 15-month-old daughter in my arms today, watching her eyelids grow heavy, a quote I recently stumbled upon resonated deeply with me: “Whatever’s good for your soul…do that.” In that precious moment, there was nowhere my baby would rather be than nestled in my arms. Honestly, what could be more nourishing for the soul?
Interestingly, the very advice I had received with my first child — “Don’t rock her to sleep! You’ll regret it!” — lingered in my mind during those early months. Each time I rocked her to sleep, I couldn’t shake the apprehension of potential regrets. I explored other sleep strategies and attempted to lay her down “drowsy but awake,” as I had been instructed. Sometimes it worked; other times, I simply rocked her to sleep. Ultimately, did any of it matter in the grand scheme?
Does my now 3½-year-old sneak into our bed at night because I rocked her too often? Perhaps. But do I regret those moments? Not in the slightest. When I rock my second daughter, I no longer worry about being seen doing the “forbidden” act of rocking her to sleep. In fact, I welcome the thought of her joining us for midnight snuggles in the future.
I have two lovely daughters in this world, and if they wish to steal a few more moments of snuggles with their mama, I’ll gladly embrace it. My soul is ready for all of it. If you’re looking for more insights into parenting and the journey that comes with it, you might find this article on Cervical Insemination interesting. And if you’re considering home insemination options, check out Make a Mom for reliable kits. For further reading on pregnancy and fertility, visit Facts About Fertility — it’s a valuable resource.
In summary, the journey of parenthood is filled with unsolicited advice, but it’s essential to focus on what feels right for your family. Embrace the moments that nourish your soul, and don’t hesitate to create your path.
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