Growing up, my mother was never one to hover. Instead, she encouraged me to play outside while she took care of household chores, like baking and visiting friends. It was a different time; children were expected to entertain themselves while their parents managed daily life without a second thought.
Now, as I observe my daughter playing with her building blocks, I can’t help but feel a twinge of guilt. The sunlight glimmers in her pale blue eyes, causing her to squint as she chats to herself about the castle she’s constructing, with a baby princess nestled inside and dinosaur sisters guarding the realm. Should I be down there with her? Should I be teaching her letters or playing along to show my love?
However, I often find myself shooing her and her brother outside to explore our forested backyard, despite the presence of wildlife. I remember the time when my son, at just three years old, relaxed in his hammock while a bear wandered by just ten feet away. He ran inside, a mix of fear and exhilaration, and still recounts that moment with vivid clarity. Yes, there are risks—coyotes and mountain lions lurk—but I believe that outdoor play is essential for their growth. The only rule is they can’t play alone at twilight.
Today, society often dictates that we must closely monitor our children, preventing every possible mistake and keeping them in a protective bubble. We’re encouraged to create “bubble-wrapped” kids, gazing out at the world through pristine windows. While there are indeed dangers out there, I worry that in our attempts to shield them, we might also rob them of invaluable experiences.
When my husband was young, he once fell while wandering alone in the woods and made the ill-advised choice to pack his wound with mud from the Mississippi River, just like the Native Americans he’d read about. That incident left him with a scar and a story to tell—a reminder of his adventurous spirit. Our scars often tell the tales of our lives, and if we wrap our children in cotton wool, their bodies may remain unblemished, but they could end up like blank maps without a destination.
I will continue to encourage outdoor play because I want my kids to experience freedom. I want them to navigate their own adventures, climb rock forts, and learn from their mistakes—separate from my influence. I had a full life that my mother was unaware of, and I hope to grant my children the same opportunity to grow, learn, and yes, even collect a few scars along the way.
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In summary, letting children explore and experience life independently fosters growth and resilience. It’s essential for their development and creates lasting memories that shape who they become.
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