As a parent, I’m more than willing to say “I’m sorry” when I make a mistake. But there are certain things I stand firm on. Here are five of them.
1. Not Allowing Them to Use My Phone
My kids can ask me every day, but my answer remains unchanged. My phone is not a toy; it’s a valuable tool that I rely on for work and communication. With so many personal accounts, I can’t risk them stumbling upon inappropriate content, posting something embarrassing, or accidentally ordering a dozen orthopedic mattresses on Amazon. I’ve seen them misplace their own pants—seriously, how do you lose the pants you’re wearing? If they can’t keep track of their own clothes, they certainly can’t be trusted with my pricey phone.
2. Being True to Myself, Regardless of Their Opinions
My kids should feel lucky to have a mom who embraces her individuality and encourages them to do the same. I won’t apologize for my taste in music, my casual attire, or my exuberant dance moves in the kitchen. If I want to remind them I love them at school drop-off—even if their friends are watching—I will do it loudly and proudly. It’s important for them to understand that embracing one’s uniqueness is vital, and I won’t shy away from showing them that, even if they find it “lame.”
3. Expressing My Disappointment
There are moments when I feel proud, amused, or even frustrated with my kids. When I’m genuinely disappointed, I believe it’s crucial to communicate that feeling. I know their potential and want them to feel the weight of disappointing someone who believes in them. Shielding them from these emotions won’t help them grow; instead, it’s essential for them to recognize their mistakes and learn from them. It’s not about guilt trips, but about understanding the responsibilities that come with their actions.
4. Not Always Covering for Them
I’m always in their corner, but that doesn’t mean I’ll be their personal assistant. If they forget their glasses, homework, or any other essential item, I won’t rush to school to save the day. They’re old enough to take responsibility for their belongings. Each morning, we do a quick checklist before leaving the house. If they neglect to double-check, they’ll have to deal with the consequences at school. Life’s lessons often come from annoying situations, and it’s my job to help them learn to be responsible.
5. Keeping It Real
While I can’t change the culture of participation trophies, I can teach my kids the value of hard work and earning accomplishments. I won’t let them rest on empty compliments from others. Life can be challenging, and it’s normal to face hurdles. I want them to understand that resilience and effort are what lead to true success. Instead of shielding them from every bump in the road, I’ll help them navigate through difficulties, showing them that overcoming challenges is part of the journey.
Some may see me as a strict parent who doesn’t prioritize fun, but that couldn’t be further from the truth. I may not apologize for these things, but I fill our lives with laughter, the appreciation of comic books, and the freedom to be themselves. One day, they might recognize that being a bit of a weirdo is perfectly okay—especially when it’s in their genes.
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In summary, parenting is about balance. While I stand firm on certain principles, I also ensure that our lives are filled with joy and authenticity.
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